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To tell your partner or not to tell...sexual fantasy vs. reality

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  • To tell your partner or not to tell...sexual fantasy vs. reality

    What do you guys think about sharing your deepest sexual fantasy's/fetishes with your partner. Some you would obviously share but others may freak them out. Some may backfire...some may lead you to think differently about who you are with. Ill give you an example of some of my fantasy/fetishes...women, what would you think if a man you were dating said these things to you.

    1. I have a huge fetish for small penis humiliation even though according to the national average Im slightly above in length and right at it in girth. I love the thought of really hot women laughing at me, pointing, taking pictures and vids while I masturbate in front of them. Its weird, I know but its something I developed early on. Too weird to share?

    2. I love fantasizing that my girlfriend is out and gets talked into a gangbang of 4-5 guys because she heard they had big penises. This one I would hate to share only because I wouldnt want to see a favorable reaction as if she would want to do it. As much as I like to fantasize about it I would not want this to really happen...not even with one guy.

    3. I love the thought of my partner wearing a sexy dress with a short skirt then we go to a fast food place or something like that. She sits at a table by herself in front of a table of guys while I sit back and observe. She spreads her legs so they can see up her dress getting them all horned up. Eventually guys just make their way over to her trying to pick her up...she politely rejects then I come over and act like I dont know her and she goes home with me and then I fuck her like crazy. This one I wouldnt mind seeing.

    What are your thoughts? Are there fantasy's you absolutely would not share no matter what? Would your opinion change of a guy who told these to you? Just curious what you guys think...thanks

  • #2
    I don't think sharing fetishes is a bad thing per se. If anything, at least you'll have a better understanding of the person you're in a relationship with. But I couldn't guarantee that I wouldn't look at my SO differently if he told me something like that.

    I guess it all depends on your personal expectations.
    If you hope and/or expect that your partner partakes in this fetish at some point, you're better off telling them early on in the relationship. That way no one is wasting their time on a relationship that won't offer you what you want or need.

    If you fear that not engaging in this fetish with your SO may lead you to find that fulfilment elsewhere, I also think your SO has a right to know early on. I don't think having unfulfilled sexual desires are a reason to cheat. They are a reason to break up however.

    If you don't actually want your fantasy to become reality, then I'd suggest keeping them to yourself. It won't infuence your SO in any way that you have these fantasies, and you'd only risk scaring them if they believe they will be forced to go along with it.
    You can't control the waves, but you can learn to surf

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    • #3
      communication is one of the most if not the most important things needed in a relationship. There has to be open and honest communication without getting chastised for it.

      I learned this lesson the hard way
      Last edited by iluvs; June 13th, 2018, 06:07 PM.

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      • #4
        I think it depends. What is this "partner"? A random shag, ongoing fwb or a spouse/serious relationship? Weigh your risks accordingly and pay attention to whether they can be trusted or are indiscreet. Anything can happen when you break it off.

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        • #5
          There's actually a quiz website where both you and your partner will be able to answer those kind of questions. Say, you're into X and your partner isn't into X, it won't be shown.

          http://mojoupgrade.com/

          "Mojo Upgrade is an interactive sex questionnaire for couples. We present a list of sexual fantasies to both partners separately and have them indicate their level of interest. After the couple has finished the survey, we compare the answers. If you both gave a positive response to an activity, then we'll share it; if not, we donít. That way if your partner is not game to watch midget porn with you, they won't know.

          The questionnaire only takes about 10 minutes per partner.

          Best of all, it's free (as in beer) and you don't even have to register. Get your partner, and get started."
          Last edited by hyena; June 16th, 2018, 08:09 PM.

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