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No touching?!

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  • No touching?!

    Soo im dating an amazing guy for the last two months, he has made me feel loved and I trust him.

    Heres the problem.....When we have sex he rarely touches me and has never undressed me all the way...When he does touch me its been through the pants ONLY twice and occasionally will touch my breasts without prompting. I am very touchy in the bedroom, I love giving him blowjobs. I finally asked him what is turn ons are as I haven't been able to figure it out during sex.... His TWO turn ons are my eyes and blowjobs. He does enjoy kissing me though.

    I asked him if foreplay did anything for him, he told me no, that he only liked doing it for me otherwise he wouldn't. He claims he's not use to being touchy in the bedroom, he keeps saying "if its something you like" . The last time I was with him, I would move his hands back to my hips as I felt uncomfortable knowing it wasn't something he likes.

    When I told him how i was feeling, all he would say is "I am sexually attracted to you" and that he likes to touch me but "weird habit" of not doing it.

    Am i being unreasonable by feeling unattractive, not sexually desired by him or what should I do/think?
    Last edited by Insecuredbolt; August 27th, 2017, 06:38 PM.

  • #2
    Sounds like he just doesn't know what to do. Tell him you need more foreplay to get turned on or to enjoy it. Most women do


    • #3
      Agreed. He probably just doesn't know what you like and is afraid to make a mistake.

      Take the lead by putting his hands wherever you want, and let him know what's good.
      Just because someone's by your side, it doesn't mean they're on your side.


      • #4
        Has he had any previous sexual partners? And I don't mean one night stands.


        • #5
          So here's the reality:
          Men and women are different, and often have different sexual needs;
          And to compound that fact, we are all individuals, with our own peculiarities and tendencies.

          Have a conversation. Tell him what you like, what you need, and if you have insecurities - be honest about them. If he cares about you, he'll listen.

          If you need help starting the conversation, there are lots of books on the subject, from the big sellers, like "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus"

          To more sexually explicit books that can be used as points of reference, like one my girlfriend recently dug up (free on Amazon prime):

          Talk about it, as adults. You both need to figure each other out. None of us comes with a manual.


          • #6
            I will never understand men that don't thoroughly enjoy foreplay. I have always enjoyed a slow lead up. Paying particular attention to the breast area and oral sex (both giving and receiving) and stuff that involves rubbing certain stuff on a partner's certain stuff before intercourse begins. I also don't understand doing nothing but thrusting during sex. A woman's body is a wonderful thing that needs to be fully enjoyed.

            Unfortunately that stuff dried up largely once we were married. I guess I am the only guy in the world that is frustrated by lack of foreplay.

            I would say get on the same page or move on. If your partner has shown little interest in your sexual desires your dissatisfaction will eventually lead to frustration and then resentment.


            • #7
              I donít get it either, my wife says I have incredible hands, I love just touching her all over but avoiding the genitalia as a way to tease her, itís amazing, and I love gently touching her face with the back of my hand, maybe he will come around!


              • #8
                Look, he's not touching you, so why you being generous with the BJs? You're not requiring anything of him. I wouldn't like it that he doesn't "Feel it," and he doesn't feel it. He doesn't like intimacy, just bare-bones sex and one-sided at that. You sure you want to get in deep with this guy?
                Not at all flirtatious. Why does it say that??