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Girlfriend is not as interested in sex or intimacy lately

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  • Girlfriend is not as interested in sex or intimacy lately

    Okay so I've been dating my girlfriend for 3 years. We live together and things between us are usually good, I went to jail for 15 months and got home 8 weeks ago. She stayed with me the whole time, visited me twice a week and kept money on my books and phone account. We talked about how amazing it would be for me to be home, fantasized about sex and what we were gonna do when I got home. At first when I got home the sex was great but not as good as I would have imagined. There's a connection but it seems like it's not as strong. Many nights she will get home from work around 8:30 and we will be together watching Netflix, cleaning up around the house, I go outside with her when she smokes weed, I can't smoke so I'm just there to keep her company, she makes me feel like we're about to lay down and have sex before going to bed... often once we get in bed we cuddle and when I try to seduce her or touch her intimately she stops me and says she is too tired. We don't even have sex everyday anymore and I seem like the only one who initiates it anymore. Sometimes after sex she gets cramps that debilitate her for so long. Before I went away she seemed to come into me more. I ask her what's going on and encourage her to be honest with me and tell me if she's losing attraction. She always says that she is still attracted to me but just gets too tired to have sex. But the thing is sometimes when she's not too tired for sex it seems like she just wants me to finish as fast as possible and cuts off most attempts at foreplay. I'm not inadequate at pleasing her. I make her cum and orgasm when she lets me, it's just weird that most of the time we do have sex she just wants me to get off and that's it. Am I worried for no reason? Just trying to get some feedback.

  • #2
    Encourage her to stop smoking weed.
    That is highly likely lowering her sex drive.

    Also, are you working? It might just be the case that she is tired when you aren't?

    8:30 is a pretty late finish so I assume a late start in the morning?
    How about you initiate in the morning rather than evening?


    • #3
      It's possible that she has a lower sex drive than you and it may be nothing to do with you. She prob is tired after working late too and weed likely doesn't help. It's prob strange for both of you after 15months apart. Maybe you need to date her again, take her out, have fun together. Take the focus off sex for awhile and enjoy spending time with her. Maybe you are just going through a difficult patch with it will get better in time but you do need to ask her if she's still emotionally invested in this relationship? And does she want it to work? Ask what you can do to make her feel more comfortable and intimate with you again? Communication really is key to a successful relationship and compromise. Good luck


      • #4
        I suggest try being adventurous. Ask her if she is willing to use some sex toys Australia. That would really spice it up.


        • #5
          I guess she's probably really tired. Maybe you should try taking her somewhere for a weekend, so she could relax a little.