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I really need your help!!! DESPERATE

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  • I really need your help!!! DESPERATE


    My name lets say is rknight, i am in a relationship with this WONDERFUL girl for the last 3 years and everything is fine, people often would often say that we are prime example of true love, i would literally get lost in her eyes for hours, she is the most amazing and beautiful girl i have ever seen . I really love her and she is also my bestfriend. You see in the past few weeks we had our ups and downs but our downs were more than our ups. We discussed about this and decided to push on and fight for our relationship. However she said something that still is in my head she said that " I dont feel like having sex anymore, it's not you, it is generally i do not have the desire for sex not even dirty thoughts, but during the sex with you i really enjoy it and after i like the cuddle and stuff". I asked her why and she replied that she doesn't know, i told her "you know maybe after a long time together sex may get boring and i think its time to try new things (i am not talking about other people) like toys, places to have sex, maybe initiate the sex with a game like sex dices etc." and she replied that " this is the problem i don't want to start it at all, i just don't have the mood to start". As far as i see the problem is that the initiation got boring and that she doesn't want to try. Maybe i am mistaken and it is not something like that and it is something more easily fixed because i really love her and making love with her is amazing. I really need your opinions and any help is more than welcome.

    Thank you in advance.

  • #2
    Is she taking the birth control pill? Sometimes it can screw with one's hormone levels to the point that you lose libido and can become a-sexual.

    Also: If you are spending every waking moment either together face to face or texting, in contact too much, then you aren't giving one another a chance to miss each other.

    You sound obsessed with her to be honest and that's not healthy. It's wonderful to be in love but you have to have outside interests, other friends and activities in your lives to stimulate those hormones that cause you to want one another sexually and want each other often.

    So: What is your life like and what is her life like when you're not together?
    "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!


    • #3
      What are your ups and downs about ?

      And what are you doing about the downs? Lack of sex is often just the obvious symptom of a bigger problem. That has not been communicated or resolved.

      You only want to treat the symptom but not the cause.

      Until you fix the cause , don't expect sex or dwell on getting sex.