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I have been dealing with the same person for the past 4 and a half years. He is a little younger than me but I didn't think that was a big problem when we met because I fell in love with how genuine he was.
The Long Story Short:
- We have been through his severe gambling addiction ( he'd lose over 8 thousand dollars and not care but get mad when I would stress the importance of what that money could do).
- He abandoned me when I was homeless 5 times in total ( without notice because he swore I was getting upset about him gambling or it would be over something small).
- During one of the abandoned phases he set up a dating profile where he bashed me to talk to another girl, met her for coffee, then lied to me about it, only for me to find out about it later when she texted him ( which her name was under a poker name in his phone).
- I told him I needed a car, started doing my work from home job again, he's crashed 3 cars in total ( no not one cent to help me get mine or give me one).
- I left a few things with him for safekeeping, when we broke up for a week after I couldn't take the disrespect, he lied and said it was in storage only to find out later that he threw it all in the trash ( my journal and kids footprints. .. yes gone)
- We tried to work it out, moved into a place together, he never cleaned up so I made him stay in the other bedroom, never washed dishes or did anything so we lived separately but together.
- One day when we were about to watch a movie, the girl he took for coffee texted him again ( after he had me text he a few months before to leave her alone he texted her after a few weeks when we fought apparently).
- I went out of state after we left the house to save money by staying with a friend, while gone he bought me a beautiful phone watch for V - Day.
- We got in an argument on 4/12 , he cheated 4/12 - 4/25
- When I got back in town he admitted that he cheated and wanted to work it out, surprise I was pregnant
- We try to work through it, I find out she's pregnant too, he proposed to her, - I found out she was pregnant as he was sitting next to me , a private number came on his phone he acted like no one was there, I heard her, She called back and told me she was pregnant. I didn't get mad, I comforted her and wanted him to be responsible.
- The stress caused me to have a miscarriage. She had her baby in October, I found out I was pregnant with baby number 2 ( also miscarried due to stress)
- We tried to work it out, again.
Now almost 4 and some change years later he states I need to forget the past because it's the past ( note the baby isn't a year old ) and let him start on a clean slate. We argue because he refuses to do simple things out of respect for me like look me in the eyes while talking or apologize when he says something offensive.
I told him he's wrong and now we are at the point where I want to just be done but I told him I wanted to make sure he spoke with a psychologist or got guy friends with a sense of respect so he understood where he needed to be respectful to women.
I at this point think only a friendship will end up being the result or I'll end up just tossing the whole toxic situation away. I need your thoughts.
The Long Story Short:
- We have been through his severe gambling addiction ( he'd lose over 8 thousand dollars and not care but get mad when I would stress the importance of what that money could do).
- He abandoned me when I was homeless 5 times in total ( without notice because he swore I was getting upset about him gambling or it would be over something small).
- During one of the abandoned phases he set up a dating profile where he bashed me to talk to another girl, met her for coffee, then lied to me about it, only for me to find out about it later when she texted him ( which her name was under a poker name in his phone).
- I told him I needed a car, started doing my work from home job again, he's crashed 3 cars in total ( no not one cent to help me get mine or give me one).
- I left a few things with him for safekeeping, when we broke up for a week after I couldn't take the disrespect, he lied and said it was in storage only to find out later that he threw it all in the trash ( my journal and kids footprints. .. yes gone)
- We tried to work it out, moved into a place together, he never cleaned up so I made him stay in the other bedroom, never washed dishes or did anything so we lived separately but together.
- One day when we were about to watch a movie, the girl he took for coffee texted him again ( after he had me text he a few months before to leave her alone he texted her after a few weeks when we fought apparently).
- I went out of state after we left the house to save money by staying with a friend, while gone he bought me a beautiful phone watch for V - Day.
- We got in an argument on 4/12 , he cheated 4/12 - 4/25
- When I got back in town he admitted that he cheated and wanted to work it out, surprise I was pregnant
- We try to work through it, I find out she's pregnant too, he proposed to her, - I found out she was pregnant as he was sitting next to me , a private number came on his phone he acted like no one was there, I heard her, She called back and told me she was pregnant. I didn't get mad, I comforted her and wanted him to be responsible.
- The stress caused me to have a miscarriage. She had her baby in October, I found out I was pregnant with baby number 2 ( also miscarried due to stress)
- We tried to work it out, again.
Now almost 4 and some change years later he states I need to forget the past because it's the past ( note the baby isn't a year old ) and let him start on a clean slate. We argue because he refuses to do simple things out of respect for me like look me in the eyes while talking or apologize when he says something offensive.
I told him he's wrong and now we are at the point where I want to just be done but I told him I wanted to make sure he spoke with a psychologist or got guy friends with a sense of respect so he understood where he needed to be respectful to women.
I at this point think only a friendship will end up being the result or I'll end up just tossing the whole toxic situation away. I need your thoughts.
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