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1 Year Together Got a dog and I'm Allergic

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  • 1 Year Together Got a dog and I'm Allergic

    We have been dating for a year now and things are getting pretty serious as we both know we love each other very much.

    About 6 months into our relationship she was asking me about getting a dog but I told her to be very cautious on her pick as I'm sensitive to pet dander. She found a labradoodle which is 25Lab and 75Poodle which is said to be hypoallergenic.

    After a couple months living in the house with us I started to notice the corner of my eyes swell up but I couldn't put a finger on it for months until I went and saw a doctor. He said I have a rare allergy that is causing the lympnodes to swell up in the corners of my eyes. They gave me steroid eye drops to try which made the swelling go away but almost made me blind in return.

    We talked about the dog and made adjustments to see if it would help. He wasn't allowed to sleep in our bed when I'm gone (I work week on week off on an Oil Rig), HEPA air purifiers, shampooed all of the carpets/curtains, and she bathed him twice a week in some kind of hypoallergy shampoo.

    The matter got better but I was still finding myself sneezing, itchy eyes, and very minimal swelling. It got to the point where I said the dog can't be in the house, end of story as we tried what we could. She tried explaining to me how attached to the dog she was and how there must be another way. She suggested we make him an outside dog when we live in the state of Alaska which isn't realistic in my mind. Even the idea of buying a private shed with a space heater and a special fend in area around it which would cost roughly 3,000 dollars came up. I truly feel like the dog would be miserable in this environment which is very selfish.

    We all have our on perspective on what is the right answer, keep the dog for emotion support when i'm gone at work and continue to suffer from allergies... or make her choose me or the dog...

    Its a really hard subject because I know she loves me very much... she also loves the dog very much and doesn't want to see either one of us leave her life...

    Any thoughts? Much appreciated....


  • #2
    Have you seen an allergy specialist? Maybe there are some treatments for the allery.
    "What lips my lips have kissed and where and why I have forgotten." ~Edna St. Vincent Millay


    • #3
      how about bathing dog daily and restrict it to one room in house and some outdoor times daily. Clean often and thoroughly to remove dust and dander, and wash furniture covers, curtains and other cloth items as often as possible. Buy a HEPA vacuum cleaner with a micro filter bag to catch all of the allergens. Washing your dog every day can reduce the allergens in his fur by as much as 84%


      • #4
        Oh I feel your pain and I've been down that road. The dog has to go. When I was in the ER on this issue the doctor was very compassionate and explained that she too has allergies to her animals and takes claritin/reactine every day for years. If my eyes weren't so glued shut they would have fallen out of my head. She advised me that different people have different reactions and mine was particularly bad so I might want to think about whether having that particular allergen around was wise. I had developed excessive fluid in my lungs and severe asthma (I was drowning in fact, she said) so there was very little choice for me at the time.

        As much as you love your girlfriend it boggles my mind why she's been so inconsiderate to your allergic reaction. The choice should have been made in a split second. I think you already have your answer but it pains you to believe that she's not the woman you should be with.


        • #5
          I also would like to know if you've seen an allergy specialist to make sure that it's actually the dog that is causing your discomfort. Labradoodles don't shed their fur so they very unlikely have dander. My friends son has severe asphma as well as allergies to animal dander and they have had a Labradoodle for five years now and he's suffered no symptoms.

          Before you make her make a decision about giving up her beloved pet, why not see what's going on in you with the help of an allergy specialist?
          "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!


          • #6
            I was single so it was really easy for me and certainly didn't have the idea of losing someone to contend with. I agree seeing an allergist will help you find answers in the long term but I disagree if the symptoms are impeding your basic human functions like vision, breathing, or simple functions like eating, getting to work or sleeping. Some people don't have the option of time on their side seeing a specialist (getting a referral). For us in Canada it could mean weeks of waiting. I probably would have been six feet under by then or in a much more serious condition. The issue with pet allergies or allergies in general the allergens can remain in your system for a very long time even after the source has been removed due to the allergens lingering in the environment for up to 6 months or more, as I was advised by the ER doctor and my own doctor afterward. In my personal experience, I continued having troubles breathing and itchiness in my eyes for the rest of the time I was in that apartment. I moved and I still had trouble for a few months after that.
            Last edited by Rose Mosse; January 8th, 2018, 03:51 PM.


            • #7
              First things first... get to your family doctor for a referral to a specialist... If its going to take you six weeks to see a specialist then surely your family doctor will give you meds to help alleviate your symptoms. One step at a time until you come to one conclusion (your's of getting rid of the dog) or hers (maybe you won't even have to once you are taking care of your symptoms).
              "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!