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I gave this girl I'm seeing space. But how long?

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  • I gave this girl I'm seeing space. But how long?

    I'm conflicted and very inexperienced. I met this girl at the mall and we've been having fun and she's been texting me every day since we met. Literally good morning and good night, like a routine. I'm not a fan of this behavior because I normally do stuff like this and don't like to come off clingy. We've only hung out with like 3 times

  • #2
    Sorry I hit done accidentally.

    We only hung out 3 times since the year started. We had sex twice with a condom. The 2nd time is when we ripped the condom to who's fault I don't know. She took plan b the same night. We were texting normally for 4 days after. Then I noticed she kinda dropped interest completely and I don't blame her. She's waiting for her period. But I don't know should i let her contact me. I offered her space and she said "no no its ok". I threw a feint "I miss you" to gauge her feelings for me.
    No response from her. I haven't spoked to her since February 8th. Do I still give her space? Or did abandon her. Valentines day is tomorrow. Right now I think its not worth bringing up but should I at least contact ? My birthday was last week and we talked about hanging out. She never texted me that day so I'm like thinking she's disgusted with me.

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    • #3
      she is pissing over the super unusual rip episode. you made the last conversation with the "I miss you". next text should come from her. if she doesn't respond then relationship with you is over. badgering her will not rekindle her interest in you.

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      • #4
        First you need to find out if she actually got her period, because if she hasn't then you have some responsibilities on your hands. Make sure she knows that you will be there for her and be supportive whatever the outcome. Don't go abandoning her now. That will look rely bad on you because chances are she is freaking out about the ripped condom. She already said she didn't need space so just keep being supportive.
        ​​​​​​
        Last edited by Dazed & Confused; February 13th, 2019, 02:25 PM.
        I say it as I see it. Don't take it personally!

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        • #5
          Read a bit more about the so called "plan B" and you might be a bit more understanding. The effects can last quite awhile and completely mess up a woman's cycle and hormones. It is NOT as "easy" of a fix as one might expect considering how loosely the term is thrown around. If I had known more women or had known more about how terrible the effects were (lasting about two months), I might have been more prepared. I don't think enough young women realize this before they take it. If she doesn't want to talk to you, leave her alone. It doesn't sound to me like she trusts you that much. You owe her absolutely nothing. If she comes to you with extra information, proceed on that but don't waste your time on anything else. Try to be a bit more careful with safe sex next time but don't become a quivering mess over this. You've got the rest of your life ahead of you. One step at a time.

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          • #6
            I contacted her 4 hours ago no response. She normally texts after work or before. Honestly am extremely nervous because we have been nonstop talking since we met through text. And not talking since the 8th feels like forever. I don't know how to ask. Is there a respectful way? Or do I save it for later

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            • #7
              georgeee If she doesn't contact you anymore, there is your answer. Back off. Don't contact her anymore. She knows how to contact you if she wishes to correspond with you. Take a hint, get her message and don't bother her anymore. She's ignoring you so you do the same. If she resumes contact with you, then proceed corresponding and communicating effectively. If not, move on with your life without her.
              "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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              • #8
                She texted back. I just asked how she was simple answer both ways. Then said just wanted to make sure she's okay. And that should end off but reopen connection for her to share anything. I hope

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                • #9
                  Since she took the emergency pill within 24 hrs it is almost as effective in preventing contraception as if the condom had remained intact.
                  This pill is metabolised very quickly and therefore has no long term effects. In fact if you had unprotected sex again the next day she would have to take another emergency pill because the first has already been used up in the body.
                  The hormone in it is just in a higher dose than the daily oral contraceptive.
                  But it can prevent her getting her next period depending on what stage of her menstruated cycle she was in. It does NOT mean she is pregnant.
                  So, finding out if she got her period is pointless.
                  What she can do is take a pregnancy test a few days after her period was due .

                  She is most likely just feeling anxious.

                  Btw you shouldn’t have texted “I miss you” purely to gauge how she’s feeling. That was selfish and uncaring imo.
                  Offering her space was also a little off since there is a very very slight chance she could become pregnant by you. I’m talking less than 5% chance.
                  However its also selfish of her to not keep you updated about when her period is due etc.

                  You are BOTH responsible for your actions.

                  I think a phone call and offer to meet and chat is what you should be doing.
                  Thats of course IF you are wanting a relationship with her or IF you do care to know of the outcome.


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                  • #10
                    I'm not trying to manipulate her, I'm so insecure in my ability to lead a relationship because I've been alone almost all my life. I just used that to see if she needed space because sometimes I think girls say one thing and mean another. Idk.

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                    • #11
                      I don't think I'm going to seek her out again. If she wont contact me on her own then it is a clear sign.
                      I just felt things going right for once and now for it to be over makes me depressed. All because of my lack of experience with everything. I've been alone all my life and am just tired of being alone
                      Last edited by georgeee; February 14th, 2019, 08:12 PM.

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                      • #12
                        You two were not ready to have sex together because there is ALWAYS a chance for pregnancy, and both need to discuss that possibility like mature adults, and if something happens like a torn condom then communicate like adults and work together on it. Her stopping communication with you was selfish, even though she certainly freaked out. This was a serious issue and forget texting, talk on the phone or in person like adults next time.

                        You should not seek her out unless she seeks you out first. That means if she texts you in a friendly way, she is seeking you out. She may do that in a month or so after this scare has worn off.



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                        • #13
                          People are right here. She cant keep you hanging on a thread like that. Give a call and ask her straight out what's going on.
                          I say it as I see it. Don't take it personally!

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                          • #14
                            The ball is in her court now. Stop texting her. You checked in to see how she was. That's all that needed to be done. It could be that she wants to distance herself now or reign herself in because of the pregnancy scare she just went through (or fear of getting pregnant). She probably is trying to take a step back and rethink her choices when she went through something scary (like condom breaking with someone she barely knew).

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                            • #15
                              by now you must understand she hates you and will only seek to hurt you for dumping in her raw. You could have pulled out before squirting in her orifice.

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