Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Was I wrong to tell her we needed to talk

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Was I wrong to tell her we needed to talk

    I have been dating this girl for a few months, getting to know one another. Things are going great and I am ready to advance this to something more serious

    I texted her last night and said I needed to stop by Saturdya night or sunday morning.

    She asked why and I told her we needed to talk. She said "Ok, about what?"

    I said "Well I think we need to decide where this is going , and what we are both feelings about each other"

    she said "alright"

    I said to her "its been almost 3 -4 months about, I just think it's time we decided what we want out of this"

    she then said "true true fair point"

    Was I wrong to tell her all that? I mean would it have been better to just surprise her with the talk?

  • #2
    Personally, from a girls perspective, if I got those messages I’d get the impression that although you want to talk about the future, you’re also not that keen anymore. It sounds a bit blunt in the sense that you’re not enthusiastic saying “we’ve been seeing each other for a few months and I’m really enjoying our time together and I just wanna chat to see if you want to take things further” you’re just saying you need to talk and not giving much context. she might just be a bit thrown off. Nothing to worry about just make sure she knows how you truely feel! X

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by Pbear123456 View Post
      Personally, from a girls perspective, if I got those messages I’d get the impression that although you want to talk about the future, you’re also not that keen anymore. It sounds a bit blunt in the sense that you’re not enthusiastic saying “we’ve been seeing each other for a few months and I’m really enjoying our time together and I just wanna chat to see if you want to take things further” you’re just saying you need to talk and not giving much context. she might just be a bit thrown off. Nothing to worry about just make sure she knows how you truely feel! X
      so it didnt make me look clingy

      Comment


      • #4
        Heathsummesun With all this texting, yes, most of the time, especially if you're local, it's better to surprise with a talk but do so diplomatically and with great manners and consideration in order to be effective. Always remain gracious, polite and respectful. Texting too much gives the recipient an opportunity to shut you down, decline and not discuss what's on your mind. In person is best and secondly, verbally on the phone. Texting back 'n forth (or emails / messenger) can get abrupt and / or nasty and ugly very quickly!
        "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

        Comment


        • #5
          I think it sounds ominous, OP. I'd be a little puzzled by your announcement and wonder what you're going on about. I'd have preferred if someone I was seeing just used body language (eye contact etc) and made a move. There's a lot that can be interpreted in physical touch or how you behave with someone in person. I realize not many people are comfortable with that and that's fine. Since it's done though, just roll with it and instead of asking her how she feels about you, turn it into a special day or evening if you're meeting with her. Take her out to somewhere nice and share your feelings with her if you want to. Your approach is kind of cute but I think you could smooth it out a little. There's nothing wrong with it. See where it goes. I hope it works out for the both of you.

          Comment

          Working...
          X