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Should I date him or just stay friends?

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  • Should I date him or just stay friends?

    Hey you beautiful people! Iím in a bit of a situation and could use some advice.
    I met a really (REALLY) nice guy! We met in ROTC (Itís a program at my college for the Army); heís one of the leaders of the squads. We went out for lunch, and really hit it off. Like, Iíve never felt so comfortable with someone before! But more like in a ďfriendsĒ kind of way. I pretty much can be myself, which is rare! I never open up to anyone that quickly. But anyway, went on a second date. It went really well, he made me dinner and we watched some classic movies! Cuddled for a bit, had some deep conversations. Went on a car ride, broke out singing together (again, something I donít usually do). But I just didnít feel that intimate/sexual feeling that I usually get. Heís not unattractive by any means! I could tell he was really into me in ďthatĒ way. But the feeling really wasnít mutual, so I didnít really try to be flirty or lead him on. I just feel like weíre really good friends! And I donít want to ruin that. I wish we could be more, but I just donít feel it. It didnít feel right. Iím also kind of scared of intamcy! Still a virgin, never truly kissed, so no experience. But usually get a feeling around certain guys where I want to. But I donít with him, and I have no idea why. Heís literally perfect in every way! I donít know what to do. Plus I donít want to make it weird since we see each other every day in training. And Iím really close with all of his friends (who I train with everyday. Itís just so frustrating. He has not a single flaw yet Iím just not ďturned onĒ I guess. Whatís up with that?

  • #2
    It happens. I've met women who I just don't feel that connection or spark with, even tho I'm having a great time with them and there's nothing actually wrong with them.

    If you aren't feeling it, then you shouldn't string it out. Let him know. It's okay to not feel that connection to someone. Even if you think you "should"


    • #3
      Donít ďdateĒ him again if you arenít feeling it.

      He wants more so you canít be friends.
      Its unfair on him .


      • #4
        Hanbanan89 Tell him the truth so you won't waste his time, energy and resources on you if he has expectations for this friendship to develop into a girlfriend-boyfriend relationship. After being honest with him, ask him if he wants to be just friends. Be prepared for a "yes I want to be friends with you only" or he'll back off and become distant. If he's willing to be just friends, that's great. If not, since you see him frequently, remain cordial and respectful.
        "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."