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Very potent attraction

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  • Very potent attraction

    Ok so, i have a financial councler that i meet with weekly. I just turned 23. She is 28. She is engaged to a dude with cold feet. And they fight alot as of late.I am very independent, mature, careful etc. Ive lived on my own in orange county since i was 17. Ive had consitant weekly meet ups with her for about 10 months. She has seen me turn my life into a interesting one. So from the start even i wasnt on top of my , she said she had a connection with me, our meeting have only gotten more about us talking and having fun and now her job is almost secondary to our meet up. She allows me to compliment her more and more. Not really at first i can tell she wasnt rdy. But now she blushes and plays with her hair. She tell me more about how she hasnt been talking to her fiance or their issues and shes very carefully about it. She doesn't even tell her co workers but me she does. She is very engaged when i talk about my sex life witch as of late has been really good. Very abundant. But i cant stop thinking of her still. She had mentioned one other time how she can just see we have a connection. But that is it. Just a connection. But it has gotten more sexual tension like since. We glow with attraction we have to hide it to not draw attention from other her co worker . I gave her a clothing gift she tells.me how.much.she wears it etc. We are very playful and have fun we tease eatch other alot. Lots of prolonged eye contact. But i can tell she is holding back alot. She recently stopped wearing her ring and i about my pooed pants, do i have a chance here? How do i close.this gap? Do i wait? I know i can cut her off but neither of us want that. I care her so much.... Any questions for me?

  • #2
    She has a fiancÚ. Until he is out of her life, keep your relationship with her professional & platonic.

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    • #3
      and i about my pooed pants,
      w... T... F...
      "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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      • #4
        Lmao im sorry i was just really surprised she stoped wearing the ring for last 2 of our meeting was a pretty flashy ring
        Last edited by Tonybhosonicgt; May 11th, 2018, 02:44 PM.

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        • #5
          phew... for a minute there I thought she took off her ring and you took off the pants you pooed.

          Anyway, if you're a good man with an edge (which is the best kind) then you will tell her that if she's ever single to let you know and you'll buy her a drink. Keep yourself away from flirtations with taken women... it makes you not a good man and without an edge.

          You say you're getting laid a plenty so don't be an asshole and hone in on some other guys chick. Don't believe her complaints about her boyfriend. If they were as bad as she's letting on, she'd have left him by now.

          Your wasting your time visiting her in the guise of getting financial advice so much as well. She knows you're crushing on her and if you're paying for that advice, she's playing you.
          "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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          • #6
            So as part of my housing program for college i need to meet with her accordingly. She gets paid but not by me..She is really giving me some bigger signs as of late and i think i need to be direct with how i feel but not to direct where it creates to much pressure. So basically what ive been doing flirting etc. I just get to excited especially when she is throwing these bigger signs . I need to control myself.
            .I literally had sex with 3 different girls past 3 months and all the times i had sex i was thinking about her. I could harldy climax with the other girls but before that i had a dry spell for about 6 months. But i did alot of personal development last year and i think i should just keep focusing on that and being the best i can be for myself. But goddam i want her so bad . We click so hard

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Tonybhosonicgt View Post
              So as part of my housing program for college i need to meet with her accordingly. She gets paid but not by me..She is really giving me some bigger signs as of late and i think i need to be direct with how i feel but not to direct where it creates to much pressure. So basically what ive been doing flirting etc. I just get to excited especially when she is throwing these bigger signs . I need to control myself.
              .I literally had sex with 3 different girls past 3 months and all the times i had sex i was thinking about her. I could harldy climax with the other girls but before that i had a dry spell for about 6 months. But i did alot of personal development last year and i think i should just keep focusing on that and being the best i can be for myself. But goddam i want her so bad . We click so hard
              She's not emotionally or mentally available. You're making the best decision you can for yourself at this time. If I was getting to know a woman like her she'd make my stomach turn to tell you the truth. She is not the professional she claims she is being in her position (counsellor of any type) and she's easily distracted. It only tells me she lacks integrity and cannot be trusted. Every time I am speaking with her there's not a single cell in my body that wouldn't be revolted. Don't be so vulnerable. You can do better. Stay away from attached individuals and anyone who controls a part of your life such as your college degree or your finances (power imbalances). I hope you find your happiness with someone better.

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              • #8
                Stay away from her. Remain on professional, polite terms. No more no less. She's dangerous and even though she removed her ring most likely just to be in your presence, she could still be engaged to her fiance. Know your place. Shame on her and keep your relationship with her strictly business. Don't make any dumb mistakes. Beware. Use your brain and common sense.
                "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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                • #9
                  Rose thank you soooo much for that amazing advice. She does not have perfect integrity but she definitely has a good amount she really held back for a while. Im am just naturally playful and she joined eventually the. The flirting came when we stated to talk anout our relationships but even before that were having amazing conversations and still are just happy to be around eatchother. She had told me last meeting that she isnt feeling happy and asked for some advice. And then she spilled more beans about her relationship falling apart. So maybe i am a distraction? Ive never clicked so well at the same time. I feel like that is really why im attracted to her is her brain and Intellectual mind. She knows all my faults and skeletons in closet . And she is beautiful as hell that dosnet hurt. Sigh this thought process replays in my head. But i know i just need to control myself a lil more and keep building my life.

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                  • #10
                    Channel thank you for the great advise!! What do you mean by dangerous? And what could i do wrong as far as a dumb mistake. Im not trying to be a smart ass or anthing i just wouls like some more info on your opinion.

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                    • #11
                      Originally posted by Tonybhosonicgt View Post
                      Rose thank you soooo much for that amazing advice. She does not have perfect integrity but she definitely has a good amount she really held back for a while. Im am just naturally playful and she joined eventually the. The flirting came when we stated to talk anout our relationships but even before that were having amazing conversations and still are just happy to be around eatchother. She had told me last meeting that she isnt feeling happy and asked for some advice. And then she spilled more beans about her relationship falling apart. So maybe i am a distraction? Ive never clicked so well at the same time. I feel like that is really why im attracted to her is her brain and Intellectual mind. She knows all my faults and skeletons in closet . And she is beautiful as hell that dosnet hurt. Sigh this thought process replays in my head. But i know i just need to control myself a lil more and keep building my life.
                      Keep in mind since this woman has no qualms flirting behind her betrothed's back (or whomever at whatever state), she'll deceive and betray you, too as you are fair game. Consider it a warning whenever anyone cheats (not always physical either). Anyone who isn't loyal to a person and does funny business on the side with you, will _____ you, too one day. It's always a red flag whenever someone's character comes into question because you'll become their next victim. Beware. And yes, you're a distraction. Don't be so naive. Just remember if a person is shady, they'll do you in one day, too. Google the word "sociopath." They are expert masters at manipulating relationships. Also, google the word, "gaslighting."

                      I was naive once. There were never any alarm bells in my head when a person was treating someone else with dishonesty and sure enough, my turn eventually came. This manipulative person deceived and betrayed me in due time. I was ignorant not to heed my mother's warning. Live and learn the hard way. I'll never make the same mistake twice.
                      "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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                      • #12
                        Channel thank you for your continued wisdom, it really helps to decompress my emotions about the situation. So your saying she will prob screw me over in a long run. And to look at her motives..But what if im ok with getting hurt just to experience this beautiful older woman. Or are you saying it will never happen in a million years and im just a doofus/toy

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                        • #13
                          .But what if im ok with getting hurt just to experience this beautiful older woman
                          There are plenty of beautiful older women out there that are single. Why are you letting this one you are on about play you?
                          "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Tonybhosonicgt View Post
                            Channel thank you for your continued wisdom, it really helps to decompress my emotions about the situation. So your saying she will prob screw me over in a long run. And to look at her motives..But what if im ok with getting hurt just to experience this beautiful older woman. Or are you saying it will never happen in a million years and im just a doofus/toy
                            No problem, Tonybhosonicgt. If you're ok with getting hurt, remember that getting hurt isn't fun. Feeling used isn't fun. I'm not saying it won't or will happen. All I'm saying is that if a person acts abnormally towards you and lacks integrity, do not trust them because you too will fall victim to the same treatment someday. In other words this pertains to anybody. If a person doesn't treat another person with respect, this person has the strong likelihood to treat you badly one day. This is whether with cheating, lying, stealing, betraying or deceiving you. If you're ok with that, then go for it at your own risk. This is why I said, "Beware."
                            "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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                            • #15
                              well idk i have no prob attracting older or younger woman, regardless saying this with a empty ego and with all my intuition on the table. we connect so hard, ive been in "love twice" and ive never felt this way about any woman old or young, im pretty energetic playful person so much so that if you didnt know me it might turn you off....like i said she was pretty hesitant at first, but as we got to know eatchother better i can feel our attraction growing i can see it like right before my face. its a real connection regardless of sex or desire. unless it like channel said and its all a front, but i dont see what she would really get out of flirting in a kinda dangerous situation for her image and job.
                              Last edited by Tonybhosonicgt; May 11th, 2018, 10:00 PM.

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