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  • Cheat advise

    I love my boyfriend very much but he's cheated on me 3 times, every times he says he's going to change and it's always been me that he has wanted. I'm the best he's ever had, and that he's never been with some one he loves as much as me. And i really want to believe him. Half of me wants to leave him, since the second time I've always say that's it I'm leaving him, I've been cheated on before and always taken that person back and in the end I'm the one that gets hurt because usually once a cheat always a cheat. I found texts on his phone to other girls saying that he's single and that we're only living together until he's sorted himself some where to go. I felt sick to my stomach how he could just dismiss me like that! He tells me he love me all day everyday but he's always out in his car and sometimes he doesn't come home. Before I found out he ever cheated on me I trusted him 100%. He's into his cars and is out with his friends most nights so I didn't think anything of it but since he's cheated my anxiety is so bad that when I'm not around him I feel like I don't want to be with him. But then when I'm with him I try and make it work, but it's him who needs me more than I need him? I feel ashamed I've left bim carry on and treat me like this, I can't talk to my family and friends.what shoukd
    i do!

  • #2
    You know what to do. Stop wasting your time on someone who doesn't respect you enough to remain faithful.
    "What lips my lips have kissed and where and why I have forgotten." ~Edna St. Vincent Millay

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    • #3
      Pffft!
      Why don't you just stay with him until he finds your replacement? In the meantime; You do some of your own extracurricular activities on the side and maybe you'll even be 'lucky' enough to beat him to the punch and find a replacement for him before he replaces you?

      It'll be fun!

      "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

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      • #4
        Hi Sunrise 1708,

        i know exactly where you are coming from. I have been in the exact same situation! He cheated on me several times, wrote messages to other girls with sexual content and so on... and I have been the one always saying "yes we can make it, we just have to stick together". I did not make it to leave him because of a super strong emotional dependancy. And this is toxic to your heart, to your soul, to your self confidence, your existence! If you keep this relationship to his toxic person you will lose yourself eventually!

        You have to let go and this is super difficult and the first time of the breakup will suck! There will be a very hard time to come, I cant tell you better because thats reality. But as soon as this period is over - and yes, you WILL get over him, even if you cant imagine being without him right now!!!! - you will come back to have the best life again and believe you, you will even be able to look at it ina whole new point of view after a couple of month!

        My advise to get over this breakup: date yourself! Do stuff that is good for you and be selfish! If you feel like you want to try an expensive and fancy restaurant, then go do it! If travelling is best for you, then do it, also if its only for 2-3 days. Get out of your town. If you want to work out, sign up in a gym! And dont calculate the money like I did! Nothing is more important than your health. Investe in yourself and youll soon be healthy person! And when you found back to yourself Im sure youll attract many other guys and might give it a chance again!

        All the best <3

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        • #5
          Never trust a cheater. A leopard cannot change its spots. Ditch the loser.
          "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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          • #6
            You're going to have to run your course until your eyes are so cried out and you're so stripped of your self-worth that your family and friends have to bail you out. Maybe they've already done that for you and that's why you can't speak to them. Maybe you'll get it or maybe you'll never get it at all and you'll live your sorry life complaining constantly about how the world has wronged you and how men mistreat you. Your children will never respect you and every man, woman and child will walk all over you until you begin to resemble the very dirt that you've begun to embody. In all honesty one day no one will care at all whether you lived or died. You'll have to answer to yourself whether you wasted your life or whether you made something of it.

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            • #7
              Ever think that when he tells you he loves you all day that he's lying? He's a liar, a weasel, and a con. He doesnt respect you. Dont even talk to him about it, pack his things and leave it outside and change the locks or leave yourself. He probably laughs about it with his friends. You're a sucker for wanting to believe him when he's such a liar. Cheating on you 3 times isn't like dropping your favourite mug on the floor A LOT of time and decisions went into his cheating on you. Finding out yourself will make you paranoid. You need to get a backbone and stick up for yourself. Obviously you know you deserve better and his actions were intentional. He wont change. He found a sucker that believes his lies and that is you. If he loved you, then he wouldn't hurt you. Then when he's out of your life go to counselling and figure out why you let yourself be disrespected and think its ok. It not ok. Choose the direction you want your life to go very clearly. If you want to be disrespected by a lying creep that can give you an STI or worse then continue, if you want to be wth someone you can trust and count on that cares about you then leave. DO NOT talk to him. He's very manipulative and knows how to play you to make you doubt yourself, even wondering what to do means he mind f****ed you big time. Of course you need to get rid of him. Give your head a shake. He's been brainwashing you and this isn't the first time he's done this, he's a pro. MOVE ON.

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              • #8
                My husband broke my favourite mug just the other day.

                Op: Has done what most of them do and has effed off after posting.

                You still lurking, *Sunrise1708?*
                "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by phasesofthemoon View Post
                  My husband broke my favourite mug just the other day.

                  Op: Has done what most of them do and has effed off after posting.

                  You still lurking, *Sunrise1708?*
                  My husband breaks my shit all the time. Expensive wine glasses, flower pots, serving dishes, etc.

                  We should make posters sign a pledge to respond to our comments or else we take their first-born.
                  Last edited by SarahLancaster; March 2nd, 2018, 03:29 PM.
                  "What lips my lips have kissed and where and why I have forgotten." ~Edna St. Vincent Millay

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                  • #10
                    ... ...
                    "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

                    Comment

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