My Dad's been married three times. His last girlfriend sued for divorce because they had been together eight years or so. Dad has been dating off and on, random women, some close to my age. When I went home, he said that he wanted to marry Cola. Cola was his masseuse, and then became his house keeper. I met her as his house keeper while I was over there. Dad told me he wanted to marry her. I didn't take it seriously at first because 1) she's married; 2) she and him don't actually act like a couple; 3) He was drunk every time he told me these things.
It started to seem more serious and less of a jest when his friends told me things like, "They've both seen lawyers, we got her one who speaks her language so she knows exactly what's happening." and "They have paperwork going through already." and "When your Dad and Cola get married, he's going to stop drinking." Still, I wasn't sure. Why would a woman leave a man who's not bad to her, to be married to another man... without even dating or going on trips together etc? So I was confused. After promising my brother that he wouldn't get married again, Dad's flipped 180 and decided to marry her even though she has a daughter.
As soon as I'm back in NZ, I get told that she's moved in with her daughter, she's filed for divorce, (should go through in 60 days as per Texas law) she has a wedding ring, and that they're planning a white wedding in Hawaii. I'm expected to go. I don't really know if I want to.
I told my Dad that I'm happy for him as long as he's happy. He says he's happy. Told me himself that he finally has a reason to stop drinking. (Which hurt, considering I thought me and my brothers would have been enough of a reason.) I don't know this woman, and I suppose some of me feels threatened. Hell, while I was in Hawaii with him over the holidays, he brought two strippers with him.
It's just a very sudden random turn of events. I'm having trouble dealing with all this. I don't understand why though. I'm 24, my parents have been divorced since I was 12, and I DO want my parent's happiness. I'll randomly cry and go, "why is he doing this?" The rational explanation is, "He wants someone to take care of him in old age." But it's going to be odd and uncomfortable for me to accept someone new into my life... a new "mother?" a new "sister?" .... dunno, my rational side doesn't care, but for some reason this still hurts?
It just feels like because he's drinking himself to death he is finally ready to play Dad and husband. It's a shame that he couldn't bring himself to do that for me and the boys. (Married to my mother or not!)
*sigh* It just feels like it's all too fast for all this to be going on.