Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Joke of a Relationship

Collapse
X
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Joke of a Relationship

    I’m a 20 year-old female in a relationship with an older guy (56, to be more precise). I’ll refer to him as “Gary” for the purposes of this post. Before you start hurling accusations of “gold-digger”, hear me out. I first met him through a “sugar baby/sugar daddy” site; it was my first foray into this sort of arrangement. I’m from a middle-class background, with parents who support me while I work and do my undergrad at an overseas university, so I didn’t need the money. I think curiosity got the better of me and I was impressed with the glamorous lifestyle some of these “SBs” led.


    Anyways, he was the first guy I chose to go out with from that site. He was very polite, attentive and considerate, juxtaposing him with the rude jerks I’ve met from the site. We met in public a few times to get to know each other but after the third meeting, I told him I couldn’t follow through with the arrangement - I was uncomfortable with exchanging money for sex and decided to end our “SB/SD” arrangement. We parted on a cordial note and agreed to remain friends.


    A few weeks later, I rang him to ask if we could meet up for coffee. For a bit of context, I’m an international student; at that point, I was a year in to my studies in a new country with no family, little friends, etc. On top of that, I have/had trouble socializing and maintaining friendships. Gary was there to fill the void in my social life, however temporarily. I felt comfortable talking to him as there was no pressure to put on a facade for the sake of fitting in.

    A few months after we started going out, he started saying things like, “I kind of see you as my girlfriend” and the like. We were in this limbo stage until I kind of pushed him to start a relationship as girlfriend-boyfriend (first mistake). I don’t know how long it would have taken for him to step up to this on his own initiative but, being very headstrong, I took the first step and he agreed.


    Fast-forward to a couple of months later, I learned from him he has no steady income and he’s on a limited budget until he gets his settlement check. I kind of suspected this since even during the early stages of the arrangement and our relationship, he was conservative with money (something which bothered be in the arrangement stage as the whole point of it is to be spoiled by a wealthier man). I accepted this as I wasn’t in it for the money, that our relationship wasn’t an arrangement, and made do with what he had. He was generous with his money, regardless, as he paid for all of our lunches, movie outings, etc. but he would make passing comments here and there which illustrated how lean his budget is, ie making me put back an energy bar in the grocery store as it was expensive, complaining about spending 100 dollars here and there as it could add up, lecturing me how working people can’t afford to go out for brunch as frequently as I’d wanted to go out (which was twice a week, since I only saw him a few days out of the week), etc.


    I started to resent him for this as a lot of younger working guys I’ve dated in the past could afford a lot of the things he couldn’t/can’t with minimal complaints about money. I started to become envious of my friend whose boyfriend treated her to phenomenal and expensive meals when they went out, despite earning 70,000 a year. I started to question why he even bothered entering a relationship, much less an arrangement, if he was so strapped for money.


    To make matters worse, he was emotionally distant; he refused to talk about a future together, overreacted when I asked him to buy me certain things like a jacket, didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day, Easter, etc. with me, forgot my birthday even though I told him in advance (plus, it’s a really easy date as it coincides with Christmas) and the general vibe I got from him was one of boredom and disinterest. I thought maybe it was because he didn’t have an income, that it was depressing him. We had many fights over money as it was obvious his financial problems were poisoning our relationship.


    I got thinking and out of paranoia, I went through his phone messages one night while he was away at the gym. He always kept his phone unlocked and plus, I heard a notification ring. I found several flirtatious messages directed at 2 different women he’d been talking to for months. On top of that, he’d made plans to go out with them! This all occurred while he was telling me how we couldn’t afford to go out as much as I’d wanted to, how lucky I was to have the privilege of going out so often (paraphrasing, but this is what he’d implied). I confronted him about it and he was defensive and angry at first, refusing to apologize until I told him to do so. Then he softened and said he wouldn’t do it again. I accepted this since for all I knew, he didn’t physically cheat (second mistake). But all of our relationship problems remained, he was back to being callous, so I decided to snoop again.



    I accessed his Facebook and WhatsApp messages and what I found was horrifying. I not only discovered he was in touch with other women, keeping pronographic videos of his past arrangement SBs on his laptop, but also that he has a secret family in the Philippines he never told me about (he claimed he was just a sperm donor and he doesn’t want to play the role of father, but will talk to and financially support them). Even more shockingly, he offered one women a passport if she came over to his home country and agreed to have his child. He again got angry when I confronted him over this, directing all the fault/blame towards me for snooping. He later apologized but I felt devastated. Still, I forgave him (third mistake). I was scared of being alone at that point so I felt I had to stick it out, as awful as all of this was. The fear of being alone overrode all rationality. Plus, I believed him and thought he would put all of this garbage behind him for a fresh start with me. He’s good at talking and charming his way through these situations. I realized too late he’s just really glib. So then it was back to the same old emotional rollercoaster of neglect, apathy, threats to end the relationship and the angry outbursts.


    I didn’t want to snoop anymore, as I felt guilty, so I decided to pretend to be one of his arrangement SBs (Ashley) and contacted him late one night. He had mentioned to me before how he might go to another state to visit his brother but he sounded kind of iffy. He made no mention of inviting me there, despite us not having travelled during the 9 months we had been together. When I contacted him as Ashley, he immediately invited me to go to Queensland with him, agreeing to pay for plane tickets and hotel expenses. When I asked him if he was available as a sugar daddy, he said yes and asked to visit me. He apologized and I forgave, same old same old (fourth mistake). I later discovered his kik username and decided to see if he was really committed this time.


    I went back to my home country and posed as a random girl on kik. He again started flirting with me and asked for bikini pics, but I called him out shortly after. He tried dumping me while I was overseas over e-mail when I told him firmly I wanted his dishonesty to end.


    So now that I’m back to my studies, he tells me how much he’s missed me and how he was stress-eating when thinking of how he’d lose me. He deactivated his kik account and deleted his WhatsApp/FB messages, and tells me he’ll get his settlement check soon so we won’t have many of the problems we’ve been having (he told me this 4.5 months ago but apparently there’s been unexpected delays in getting his money).


    At this point, I’m emotionally exhausted, embarrassed and resentful. I only want him for his money and the lifestyle it can provide because after 7+ months of constant and outright lies, dishonesty and disloyalty, I’m ready to find a different man. He’ll be like a placeholder for me until I find a better partner. Should I stick it out and reap the benefits of his money when it comes (he says it’ll be within this month though he doesn’t know when exactly), or am I being taken for a ride again?
    Last edited by user15620; August 6th, 2018, 08:53 PM.

  • #2
    Originally posted by user15620 View Post
    I’m a 20 year-old female in a relationship with an older guy (56, to be more precise). I’ll refer to him as “Gary” for the purposes of this post. Before you start hurling accusations of “gold-digger”, hear me out. I first met him through a “sugar baby/sugar daddy” site; it was my first foray into this sort of arrangement. I’m from a middle-class background, with parents who support me while I work and do my undergrad at an overseas university, so I didn’t need the money. I think curiosity got the better of me and I was impressed with the glamorous lifestyle some of these “SBs” led.


    Anyways, he was the first guy I chose to go out with from that site. He was very polite, attentive and considerate, juxtaposing him with the rude jerks I’ve met from the site. We met in public a few times to get to know each other but after the third meeting, I told him I couldn’t follow through with the arrangement - I was uncomfortable with exchanging money for sex and decided to end our “SB/SD” arrangement. We parted on a cordial note and agreed to remain friends.


    A few weeks later, I rang him to ask if we could meet up for coffee. For a bit of context, I’m an international student; at that point, I was a year in to my studies in a new country with no family, little friends, etc. On top of that, I have/had trouble socializing and maintaining friendships. Gary was there to fill the void in my social life, however temporarily. I felt comfortable talking to him as there was no pressure to put on a facade for the sake of fitting in.

    A few months after we started going out, he started saying things like, “I kind of see you as my girlfriend” and the like. We were in this limbo stage until I kind of pushed him to start a relationship as girlfriend-boyfriend (first mistake). I don’t know how long it would have taken for him to step up to this on his own initiative but, being very headstrong, I took the first step and he agreed.


    Fast-forward to a couple of months later, I learned from him he has no steady income and he’s on a limited budget until he gets his settlement check. I kind of suspected this since even during the early stages of the arrangement and our relationship, he was conservative with money (something which bothered be in the arrangement stage as the whole point of it is to be spoiled by a wealthier man). I accepted this as I wasn’t in it for the money, that our relationship wasn’t an arrangement, and made do with what he had. He was generous with his money, regardless, as he paid for all of our lunches, movie outings, etc. but he would make passing comments here and there which illustrated how lean his budget is, ie making me put back an energy bar in the grocery store as it was expensive, complaining about spending 100 dollars here and there as it could add up, lecturing me how working people can’t afford to go out for brunch as frequently as I’d wanted to go out (which was twice a week, since I only saw him a few days out of the week), etc.


    I started to resent him for this as a lot of younger working guys I’ve dated in the past could afford a lot of the things he couldn’t/can’t with minimal complaints about money. I started to become envious of my friend whose boyfriend treated her to phenomenal and expensive meals when they went out, despite earning 70,000 a year. I started to question why he even bothered entering a relationship, much less an arrangement, if he was so strapped for money.


    To make matters worse, he was emotionally distant; he refused to talk about a future together, overreacted when I asked him to buy me certain things like a jacket, didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day, Easter, etc. with me, forgot my birthday even though I told him in advance (plus, it’s a really easy date as it coincides with Christmas) and the general vibe I got from him was one of boredom and disinterest. I thought maybe it was because he didn’t have an income, that it was depressing him. We had many fights over money as it was obvious his financial problems were poisoning our relationship.


    I got thinking and out of paranoia, I went through his phone messages one night while he was away at the gym. He always kept his phone unlocked and plus, I heard a notification ring. I found several flirtatious messages directed at 2 different women he’d been talking to for months. On top of that, he’d made plans to go out with them! This all occurred while he was telling me how we couldn’t afford to go out as much as I’d wanted to, how lucky I was to have the privilege of going out so often (paraphrasing, but this is what he’d implied). I confronted him about it and he was defensive and angry at first, refusing to apologize until I told him to do so. Then he softened and said he wouldn’t do it again. I accepted this since for all I knew, he didn’t physically cheat (second mistake). But all of our relationship problems remained, he was back to being callous, so I decided to snoop again.



    I accessed his Facebook and WhatsApp messages and what I found was horrifying. I not only discovered he was in touch with other women, keeping pronographic videos of his past arrangement SBs on his laptop, but also that he has a secret family in the Philippines he never told me about (he claimed he was just a sperm donor and he doesn’t want to play the role of father, but will talk to and financially support them). Even more shockingly, he offered one women a passport if she came over to his home country and agreed to have his child. He again got angry when I confronted him over this, directing all the fault/blame towards me for snooping. He later apologized but I felt devastated. Still, I forgave him (third mistake). I was scared of being alone at that point so I felt I had to stick it out, as awful as all of this was. The fear of being alone overrode all rationality. Plus, I believed him and thought he would put all of this garbage behind him for a fresh start with me. He’s good at talking and charming his way through these situations. I realized too late he’s just really glib. So then it was back to the same old emotional rollercoaster of neglect, apathy, threats to end the relationship and the angry outbursts.


    I didn’t want to snoop anymore, as I felt guilty, so I decided to pretend to be one of his arrangement SBs (Ashley) and contacted him late one night. He had mentioned to me before how he might go to another state to visit his brother but he sounded kind of iffy. He made no mention of inviting me there, despite us not having travelled during the 9 months we had been together. When I contacted him as Ashley, he immediately invited me to go to Queensland with him, agreeing to pay for plane tickets and hotel expenses. When I asked him if he was available as a sugar daddy, he said yes and asked to visit me. He apologized and I forgave, same old same old (fourth mistake). I later discovered his kik username and decided to see if he was really committed this time.


    I went back to my home country and posed as a random girl on kik. He again started flirting with me and asked for bikini pics, but I called him out shortly after. He tried dumping me while I was overseas over e-mail when I told him firmly I wanted his dishonesty to end.


    So now that I’m back to my studies, he tells me how much he’s missed me and how he was stress-eating when thinking of how he’d lose me. He deactivated his kik account and deleted his WhatsApp/FB messages, and tells me he’ll get his settlement check soon so we won’t have many of the problems we’ve been having (he told me this 4.5 months ago but apparently there’s been unexpected delays in getting his money).


    At this point, I’m emotionally exhausted, embarrassed and resentful. I only want him for his money and the lifestyle it can provide because after 7+ months of constant and outright lies, dishonesty and disloyalty, I’m ready to find a different man. He’ll be like a placeholder for me until I find a better partner. Should I stick it out and reap the benefits of his money when it comes (he says it’ll be within this month though he doesn’t know when exactly), or am I being taken for a ride again?
    If you want money go get a part time job. And don’t say you don’t have the time because of your studies.
    The time you spend with this loser could be spent working in a cafe or shop WHILE making friends along the way.

    You have just wasted 7 months of your life whoring yourself out for less money than you would make working 8-12 hrs per week in a cafe. Really??

    This guy posed as a sugar daddy online but he is not one. He is basically duping younger women under the pretence he has money because he can’t afford the local brothel.
    And btw the classic sugar daddy is a successful business man , not some loser with some fraudulent insurance claim or whatever this settlement supposedly is.

    In saying that you also falsely advertised yourself as a sugar baby. It’s not about age. And it seems you are too immature to even know what a sugar baby’s role is. And a sugar baby certainly does not snoop. She gets the glamorous lifestyle (from an actual sugar daddy) , entertains him and asks no questions.

    As for his Filipino family, I know a few guys that have the same arrangement. It’s pretty common.
    But NOT amongst sugar daddies. These guys are well below average in looks , an average wage but live week to week spending most of their disposable income on alcohol and pot. Visit the Phillipines once per year. Bring their Filipino girl and kid over here once per year. Send a minimal amount of money over monthly ( a lot in Phillipines) and it’s basically a financial arrangement that they can afford (barely) in exchange for a few weeks of sex per year ( because they certainly can’t get it here for free)

    I have no idea why you are so shocked but I’ll put it down to immature naivety.

    So continue to give him sex for less than the minimum wage if you want , but if there is a settlement, you won’t see any of it.

    Dont be be such a fool.
    Get a freakin job, make friends , get an sti check and stop being a whore to a loser.

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by user15620 View Post
      I’m a 20 year-old female in a relationship with an older guy (56, to be more precise). I’ll refer to him as “Gary” for the purposes of this post. Before you start hurling accusations of “gold-digger”, hear me out. I first met him through a “sugar baby/sugar daddy” site; it was my first foray into this sort of arrangement. I’m from a middle-class background, with parents who support me while I work and do my undergrad at an overseas university, so I didn’t need the money. I think curiosity got the better of me and I was impressed with the glamorous lifestyle some of these “SBs” led.


      Anyways, he was the first guy I chose to go out with from that site. He was very polite, attentive and considerate, juxtaposing him with the rude jerks I’ve met from the site. We met in public a few times to get to know each other but after the third meeting, I told him I couldn’t follow through with the arrangement - I was uncomfortable with exchanging money for sex and decided to end our “SB/SD” arrangement. We parted on a cordial note and agreed to remain friends.


      A few weeks later, I rang him to ask if we could meet up for coffee. For a bit of context, I’m an international student; at that point, I was a year in to my studies in a new country with no family, little friends, etc. On top of that, I have/had trouble socializing and maintaining friendships. Gary was there to fill the void in my social life, however temporarily. I felt comfortable talking to him as there was no pressure to put on a facade for the sake of fitting in.

      A few months after we started going out, he started saying things like, “I kind of see you as my girlfriend” and the like. We were in this limbo stage until I kind of pushed him to start a relationship as girlfriend-boyfriend (first mistake). I don’t know how long it would have taken for him to step up to this on his own initiative but, being very headstrong, I took the first step and he agreed.


      Fast-forward to a couple of months later, I learned from him he has no steady income and he’s on a limited budget until he gets his settlement check. I kind of suspected this since even during the early stages of the arrangement and our relationship, he was conservative with money (something which bothered be in the arrangement stage as the whole point of it is to be spoiled by a wealthier man). I accepted this as I wasn’t in it for the money, that our relationship wasn’t an arrangement, and made do with what he had. He was generous with his money, regardless, as he paid for all of our lunches, movie outings, etc. but he would make passing comments here and there which illustrated how lean his budget is, ie making me put back an energy bar in the grocery store as it was expensive, complaining about spending 100 dollars here and there as it could add up, lecturing me how working people can’t afford to go out for brunch as frequently as I’d wanted to go out (which was twice a week, since I only saw him a few days out of the week), etc.


      I started to resent him for this as a lot of younger working guys I’ve dated in the past could afford a lot of the things he couldn’t/can’t with minimal complaints about money. I started to become envious of my friend whose boyfriend treated her to phenomenal and expensive meals when they went out, despite earning 70,000 a year. I started to question why he even bothered entering a relationship, much less an arrangement, if he was so strapped for money.


      To make matters worse, he was emotionally distant; he refused to talk about a future together, overreacted when I asked him to buy me certain things like a jacket, didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day, Easter, etc. with me, forgot my birthday even though I told him in advance (plus, it’s a really easy date as it coincides with Christmas) and the general vibe I got from him was one of boredom and disinterest. I thought maybe it was because he didn’t have an income, that it was depressing him. We had many fights over money as it was obvious his financial problems were poisoning our relationship.


      I got thinking and out of paranoia, I went through his phone messages one night while he was away at the gym. He always kept his phone unlocked and plus, I heard a notification ring. I found several flirtatious messages directed at 2 different women he’d been talking to for months. On top of that, he’d made plans to go out with them! This all occurred while he was telling me how we couldn’t afford to go out as much as I’d wanted to, how lucky I was to have the privilege of going out so often (paraphrasing, but this is what he’d implied). I confronted him about it and he was defensive and angry at first, refusing to apologize until I told him to do so. Then he softened and said he wouldn’t do it again. I accepted this since for all I knew, he didn’t physically cheat (second mistake). But all of our relationship problems remained, he was back to being callous, so I decided to snoop again.



      I accessed his Facebook and WhatsApp messages and what I found was horrifying. I not only discovered he was in touch with other women, keeping pronographic videos of his past arrangement SBs on his laptop, but also that he has a secret family in the Philippines he never told me about (he claimed he was just a sperm donor and he doesn’t want to play the role of father, but will talk to and financially support them). Even more shockingly, he offered one women a passport if she came over to his home country and agreed to have his child. He again got angry when I confronted him over this, directing all the fault/blame towards me for snooping. He later apologized but I felt devastated. Still, I forgave him (third mistake). I was scared of being alone at that point so I felt I had to stick it out, as awful as all of this was. The fear of being alone overrode all rationality. Plus, I believed him and thought he would put all of this garbage behind him for a fresh start with me. He’s good at talking and charming his way through these situations. I realized too late he’s just really glib. So then it was back to the same old emotional rollercoaster of neglect, apathy, threats to end the relationship and the angry outbursts.


      I didn’t want to snoop anymore, as I felt guilty, so I decided to pretend to be one of his arrangement SBs (Ashley) and contacted him late one night. He had mentioned to me before how he might go to another state to visit his brother but he sounded kind of iffy. He made no mention of inviting me there, despite us not having travelled during the 9 months we had been together. When I contacted him as Ashley, he immediately invited me to go to Queensland with him, agreeing to pay for plane tickets and hotel expenses. When I asked him if he was available as a sugar daddy, he said yes and asked to visit me. He apologized and I forgave, same old same old (fourth mistake). I later discovered his kik username and decided to see if he was really committed this time.


      I went back to my home country and posed as a random girl on kik. He again started flirting with me and asked for bikini pics, but I called him out shortly after. He tried dumping me while I was overseas over e-mail when I told him firmly I wanted his dishonesty to end.


      So now that I’m back to my studies, he tells me how much he’s missed me and how he was stress-eating when thinking of how he’d lose me. He deactivated his kik account and deleted his WhatsApp/FB messages, and tells me he’ll get his settlement check soon so we won’t have many of the problems we’ve been having (he told me this 4.5 months ago but apparently there’s been unexpected delays in getting his money).


      At this point, I’m emotionally exhausted, embarrassed and resentful. I only want him for his money and the lifestyle it can provide because after 7+ months of constant and outright lies, dishonesty and disloyalty, I’m ready to find a different man. He’ll be like a placeholder for me until I find a better partner. Should I stick it out and reap the benefits of his money when it comes (he says it’ll be within this month though he doesn’t know when exactly), or am I being taken for a ride again?
      What a pretentious, c*** You really come across as some entitlement Princess who doesn't have a clue about life and who thinks it's below her to have to earn on her own what she demands others give her. pffft
      Last edited by phasesofthemoon; August 7th, 2018, 09:33 PM.
      "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

      Comment


      • #4
        What a dreadful outlook on life you have. Sounds like you are getting what you deserve.

        Comment


        • #5
          I feel very sorry for you. At some point all the things you should have learned or might have learned right up to this point in university don't seem to show for anything. I wonder about your parents and what role they played in raising you, were you objectified in any way growing up as a female in your household and I'm also wondering about your mother and your relationship with your parents. What's your mum like, was she present in your childhood and was your father ever present?

          Boredom can do many things and it sounds like you are bored. You realize that every time you engage in those kinds of activities, it's a risk. I don't feel like you're connecting at a level that's satisfying or fulfilling for you with your family members and regular network (friends and family). For that reason, you're seeking fulfillment through other means - whether it's through the use of money or through the use of people. You're testing your limits because you don't know what they are yet but I think your bonds in reality are broken and you don't know how to get them back. My suggestion to you: spend less time online when you're not studying and spend more time with your peers in person. You're losing touch with reality, far more than you were lost before. If you are resentful over incidents and events you have had with others or aren't ready, that's fine. Take your time. But recognize that your behaviour is not in touch with reality and you are a bit too far gone this time. Treat this as a limit. Reel back in and figure out why you are so hurt.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Maggiemay4791 View Post

            If you want money go get a part time job. And don’t say you don’t have the time because of your studies.
            The time you spend with this loser could be spent working in a cafe or shop WHILE making friends along the way.

            You have just wasted 7 months of your life whoring yourself out for less money than you would make working 8-12 hrs per week in a cafe. Really??

            This guy posed as a sugar daddy online but he is not one. He is basically duping younger women under the pretence he has money because he can’t afford the local brothel.
            And btw the classic sugar daddy is a successful business man , not some loser with some fraudulent insurance claim or whatever this settlement supposedly is.

            In saying that you also falsely advertised yourself as a sugar baby. It’s not about age. And it seems you are too immature to even know what a sugar baby’s role is. And a sugar baby certainly does not snoop. She gets the glamorous lifestyle (from an actual sugar daddy) , entertains him and asks no questions.

            As for his Filipino family, I know a few guys that have the same arrangement. It’s pretty common.
            But NOT amongst sugar daddies. These guys are well below average in looks , an average wage but live week to week spending most of their disposable income on alcohol and pot. Visit the Phillipines once per year. Bring their Filipino girl and kid over here once per year. Send a minimal amount of money over monthly ( a lot in Phillipines) and it’s basically a financial arrangement that they can afford (barely) in exchange for a few weeks of sex per year ( because they certainly can’t get it here for free)

            I have no idea why you are so shocked but I’ll put it down to immature naivety.

            So continue to give him sex for less than the minimum wage if you want , but if there is a settlement, you won’t see any of it.

            Dont be be such a fool.
            Get a freakin job, make friends , get an sti check and stop being a whore to a loser.

            Did you even read my post? I never entered it as a SB, we started a relationship - it was NOT an arrangement where I was given an allowance, etc. I realized even before I got involved sexually that I couldn’t do it, so we decided to have a relationship instead. Also, I do have a part-time job and am active social life. Secondly, I never advertised myself as a SB - I told him after our second meeting that I couldn’t do it. Stop being a presumptive b*tch about things you know nothing about. Read the post before you comment.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Rose Mosse View Post
              I feel very sorry for you. At some point all the things you should have learned or might have learned right up to this point in university don't seem to show for anything. I wonder about your parents and what role they played in raising you, were you objectified in any way growing up as a female in your household and I'm also wondering about your mother and your relationship with your parents. What's your mum like, was she present in your childhood and was your father ever present?

              Boredom can do many things and it sounds like you are bored. You realize that every time you engage in those kinds of activities, it's a risk. I don't feel like you're connecting at a level that's satisfying or fulfilling for you with your family members and regular network (friends and family). For that reason, you're seeking fulfillment through other means - whether it's through the use of money or through the use of people. You're testing your limits because you don't know what they are yet but I think your bonds in reality are broken and you don't know how to get them back. My suggestion to you: spend less time online when you're not studying and spend more time with your peers in person. You're losing touch with reality, far more than you were lost before. If you are resentful over incidents and events you have had with others or aren't ready, that's fine. Take your time. But recognize that your behaviour is not in touch with reality and you are a bit too far gone this time. Treat this as a limit. Reel back in and figure out why you are so hurt.
              Lol, what are you talking about? I was never objectified you moron. I never entered this relationship as a SB; one of the reasons why is because I wasn’’t OK with trading sex for money. He said fine, we parted ways until I contacted him and we became a couple.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by phasesofthemoon View Post

                What a pretentious, c*** You really come across as some entitlement Princess who doesn't have a clue about life and who thinks it's below her to have to earn on her own what she demands others give her. pffft
                I never was a SB; I had a part-time job while studying and never relied on him for rent, glamorous lifestyle, etc. nor did I expect it. We were just a normal couple. How does that make me a c*unt? Go back and read the post, d*ck.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by user15620 View Post

                  I never was a SB; I had a part-time job while studying and never relied on him for rent, glamorous lifestyle, etc. nor did I expect it. We were just a normal couple. How does that make me a c*unt? Go back and read the post, d*ck.
                  You say you were never a SB, but you act like one. You have the same expectations of your boyfriend as you would of your SD.
                  You expect to be treated to fancy things and maintained. You serent him for not spending money on you.
                  Jezus Christ, where were you during the female emancipation time? Did you miss that part of the history lesson? Ever heard of taking care of yourself? Honestly, I think women like you who think they are entitled to being pampered by their boyfriends are a disgrace.

                  You basically got what you deserved. You wanted to use this man for his money. And in turn, he used you, the way he uses all women. You deserve each other.
                  You can't control the waves, but you can learn to surf

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    LOL, no I didn’t expect to be treated like a SB; otherwise I wouldn’t have been with him for a year when I knew he had no income and was on a limited budget. Also, I’m not a feminist but even if I was, I’m independent - I support myself and don’t rely on him. So STFU, read the post before you comment because I’ve already explained this.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by user15620 View Post


                      Did you even read my post? I never entered it as a SB, we started a relationship - it was NOT an arrangement where I was given an allowance, etc. I realized even before I got involved sexually that I couldn’t do it, so we decided to have a relationship instead. Also, I do have a part-time job and am active social life. Secondly, I never advertised myself as a SB - I told him after our second meeting that I couldn’t do it. Stop being a presumptive b*tch about things you know nothing about. Read the post before you comment.
                      You met him by advertising yourself as a sb on a sb/sd website.
                      Just because you didn’t follow through with that arrangement doesn’t negate the fact that you actually advertised yourself as one.

                      Oh you have an active social life? Well perhaps you should read your post where YOU said you had little friends and had trouble socialising and maintaining friendships???

                      I was not presuming anything. I responded to what YOU told us only.

                      And if this has nothing to do with money then why in your last paragraph did you ask if you should stick it out and reap the benefits of his money when it comes?

                      I read your post. I recommend you read it too before responding.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by user15620 View Post

                        I never was a SB; I had a part-time job while studying and never relied on him for rent, glamorous lifestyle, etc. nor did I expect it. We were just a normal couple. How does that make me a c*unt? Go back and read the post, d*ck.
                        Isn't Daddy paying for your schooling while "studying?" Part time job... Pffft.

                        You go back and read it. You sound entitled and someone, perhaps your father has taught you that you should be given things by men... old men, just like your father? I dunno, perhaps you should ask your therapist.
                        Last edited by phasesofthemoon; August 10th, 2018, 07:46 PM.
                        "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Maggiemay4791 View Post

                          You met him by advertising yourself as a sb on a sb/sd website.
                          Just because you didn’t follow through with that arrangement doesn’t negate the fact that you actually advertised yourself as one.

                          Oh you have an active social life? Well perhaps you should read your post where YOU said you had little friends and had trouble socialising and maintaining friendships???

                          I was not presuming anything. I responded to what YOU told us only. I suggest YOU read Ayla's post again as well... You've been Schooled twice in one day

                          And if this has nothing to do with money then why in your last paragraph did you ask if you should stick it out and reap the benefits of his money when it comes?

                          I read your post. I recommend you read it too before responding.
                          You been schooled, User (good screen name for you btw)15620.
                          Last edited by phasesofthemoon; August 10th, 2018, 07:44 PM.
                          "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Ayla View Post

                            You say you were never a SB, but you act like one. You have the same expectations of your boyfriend as you would of your SD.
                            You expect to be treated to fancy things and maintained. You serent him for not spending money on you.
                            Jezus Christ, where were you during the female emancipation time? Did you miss that part of the history lesson? Ever heard of taking care of yourself? Honestly, I think women like you who think they are entitled to being pampered by their boyfriends are a disgrace.

                            You basically got what you deserved. You wanted to use this man for his money. And in turn, he used you, the way he uses all women. You deserve each other.
                            Wowzer... Schooled again!
                            "First off, welcome to the Relationship Forums, You'll come to understand that I don't pull any punches when giving my opinion/advice and I hope you're not so sensitive to what I see as the truth of the matter." Me!

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Why would you whore yourself out to some middle aged loser? Geez Louise, have some standards for yourself. There's nothing glamorous about prostituting yourself.

                              Comment

                              Working...
                              X