A bit of background - He's English, I'm from another country. I moved here to be with him, at first everything was awesome, then stuff got a bit less awesome. When he gets angry, he gets REALLY angry, and has, on a couple occasions, become a bit violent. And whenever we argue, if he doesn't like the way it's going, he's nasty. Like, telling me to shut up and f--- off and the like. Awesome. The sex has gone from awesome to barely there and he jerks it and lies about it, and then tells me he just doesn't ever think about approaching me for sex. I don't mind so much about porn, I just want honesty and my share of the action. We once went 6 weeks with no sex, and him insisting he'd not jerked off whole time. I just wanna be able to talk about sex with my boyfriend. Anyway, he was working a really stressful job, and we'd always wanted to move to London together. I had my doubts because of all of the above, but when things are good with him they're really good. He's smart and funny and kind (to people who aren't me).. He said things would likely be better when he had this new job in the big city, and we could get a fresh start.
Stupid move, I think.
It's been a month now, and things have gotten slightly better, but he still never initiates sex, we never talk about it, he still says nasty things when he's annoyed.
Only now I'm here in London, with a brand new 12 month contract on the flat (with a 6 month break clause), no job yet, no family or friends here to turn to. I can stay here legally, that isn't the issue. The issue is, I feel trapped. I like it in this city, but it's expensive, especially for housing. And I'm looking for a job and temping, but have no reliable income to speak of yet. My name is on bills and the flat. And if we broke up, I don't even know 100% for sure that I would want to stay here, although I likely would. I don't even know 100% for sure what I want to do with myself job-wise, so the thought of breaking up brings up a whole other host of issues in my head, like "ooh, maybe I could travel?" and then I just get too bogged down in details and stress until the moment passes and we're semi-okay again, and I just put off the idea of breaking up until it seems more feasible.