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What do I do if I like a freshman girl and I'm a senior?

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  • What do I do if I like a freshman girl and I'm a senior?

    So I'm a senior guy and there's this freshman girl that I like. I've liked her ever since school started back in September and I'm pretty sure she likes me too, but there's the basic problem of age difference. My question is should I ask her out? On one hand, I'm about to graduate and she still has three years of high school, or her parents could tell her she can't date me. On the other hand, it could be the best thing that ever happens to me. I don't know what to do! Please help!

  • #2
    Yes, ask her out. The worst she could say is "no." However, in order to be fair to her, you should explain and remind her that your lives will become separate while she remains in HS or college after you graduate. You won't see each other daily anymore and that could hinder longevity in your relationship with her. It could lead to heartache later. If she's mature enough to handle eventual separation in the future, hopefully you can prepare her for your long absences. Absence doesn't always make the heart grow fonder. Absences while your lives take on a different trajectory cause couples to drift apart.
    "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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    • #3
      What if her parents don't allow it? I haven't met them, so I don't know how they would react to their daughter dating someone as old as me, especially if they don't know me.

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      • #4
        Out of respect for her parents, introduce yourself or have her introduce you to them and take it from there. You won't know until you ask her. If her parents won't allow it, you must respect and honor their wishes. Her parents, their rules. Their house, their rules. If she were financially independent, then a different story with freedom of choices. However, since this isn't the case, her parents have the law of the land IMHO.
        "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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        • #5
          That's a good idea. I'll just introduce myself to them. Some people have been telling me to wait because she so much younger than me, but the way I see it, age doesn't really matter once you get older and I don't know what I'd be waiting for if I don't ask her out.

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          • #6
            By the way, thanks for the advice chanelle.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by Wilson723 View Post
              That's a good idea. I'll just introduce myself to them. Some people have been telling me to wait because she so much younger than me, but the way I see it, age doesn't really matter once you get older and I don't know what I'd be waiting for if I don't ask her out.
              If you wait, you'll always have a mystery and won't know until you ask. Be prepared for any scenario though.
              "If you bungle raising your children, whatever else you do well in life doesn't matter very much."

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              • #8
                I agree with chanelle . Just go ahead and ask. Take it from there. Don't worry too much about the parents' reactions until you actually know if she'll date you.
                If she says yes, she's probably the best person to decide how to approach things with her parents. She knows them best and can tell you what to expect from their reaction.
                Don't go sneaking around though, even if she wants to. Introduce yourself, be willing to answer any question they have and respect their rules.
                If it's a no to dating right now, you can always look her up a few years down the line if you're both still single.

                Make sure you're informed though on the laws in your country on underage dating/sexual activity, especially since you're going to be (or already are) over 18 soon.

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                • #9
                  I'd be very careful here. If you're over 18, then you'll be dating a minor. If you have sex with her, her parents can put you in jail.
                  "What lips my lips have kissed and where and why I have forgotten." ~Edna St. Vincent Millay

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                  • #10
                    That's no problem at all. I'm totally fine with waiting for her to get older before we do that.

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                    • #11
                      Personally, I would look on the inside and ask yourself why you like her. Is it just because she's cute or maybe funny? Does your attraction for her really seem like something that could be long term? Attraction for people can be very superficial especially in highschool. I know I experienced it. I would encourage you to think about what the next year or few years would look like if you guys did happen to start dating. She would be in highschool and that would be her life while you will be in college. You two will be in two completely different social spheres. Hope this helps!

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by AsIWeave View Post
                        I would encourage you to think about what the next year or few years would look like if you guys did happen to start dating. She would be in highschool and that would be her life while you will be in college. You two will be in two completely different social spheres.
                        Agreed. I think this would be unlikely to go anywhere.
                        Just because someone's by your side, it doesn't mean they're on your side.

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