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Unread August 24th, 2009, 09:49 PM   #1
meegerprentice
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Default why doesn't he call more often?

I met this guy a year ago and he has my number, but he doesn't call. I would say he's called somewhere around 20 times, but talks to me almost daily on the internet. I'm a very good conversationalist on the phone, and when we do talk we talk for a long time, and he'll often call me back to talk some more. He's very flirtatious and says that he likes me. He gives me lots of compliments and says that he regrets having sex with a lot of girls but not me. He also says that he wants me to move where he lives, when I bring up deciding on where I want to go.

Here are the reasons I think (possibly denial) he's not calling me:

1. He lives 2 hours away.

2. He's admitted he has low self-confidence, and that he feels awkward and a fool around girls he likes.

3. He keeps fairly busy.

4. He's admitted that he has only had one serious girlfriend his whole life. He's 23.

He calls his other friends, why doesn't he call me? Why am I limited to Yahoo Messenger or Myspace?

He said that he's dated one girl since me and was talking about how she "didn't call him back" after the date, so he assumed she wasn't interested....I was like hmm...I know how you feel. Pffft.
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Unread August 24th, 2009, 10:27 PM   #2
Pailix
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Default Re: why doesn't he call more often?

Whooaaa! Relax here..

Just cause he doesn't call you more doesn't means he doesn't like you... Maybe he doesn't want to be clingy? Maybe he has a busy life, and whats wrong with Myspace/Yahoo Messenger? To some people internet is preferably easier for people to casually text/type.

And you can't know how he feels, cause you two haven't been on a date = /. Not being harsh, but LDR just seems like he's being flirty/and just wanting your attention..

I have a girl who does that with me too, we met over Yahoo! Answers, and we talked alot before she drifted away cause she met some guy. I don't think she liked me, but she loved talking to me.

1) He might just be flirting/playing around... 2 hours away, most likely means you won't really see him, and it is easier for him to talk like he really likes you on the internet.

2) He might even have a girlfriend, who knows?

3) Have you ever visited him?
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Unread August 24th, 2009, 11:04 PM   #3
meegerprentice
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Default Re: why doesn't he call more often?

Yeah i've visited him, usually when we are in each others cities we make a point to call each other, just to hang out or something. We met through mutual friends.

He was contacting me on a daily basis and when I visited him last week he was extremely complimentive, wanted me to stay the night, etc. He cuddled with me and we made out.

But then he didn't call or contact me the next day, or the next, so I sent him a message that said, "hey I had fun the other night, we should hang out more often" and still no reply for a couple more days. It's kind of out of character for him because he usually responds pretty promptly. When he did reply it was short, he said he was busy at work and that he had fun too.

Then I responded to that message about 2 days ago and he hasn't responded back. He just read it.

You have to understand I'm a really lonely person right now because I'm not in a place where I want to be right now. I am extremely analytical and often times make something out of nothing.

How can I ask him what his intentions are without being seemingly clingy or trying to rush things, which I'm not trying to do. I'm just an overanalyzer not trying to get into a situation that may get me hurt.
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Unread August 25th, 2009, 10:52 AM   #4
keydow
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Default Re: why doesn't he call more often?

Most of my male friends HATE talking on the phone. Its just something were not into. Why dont you try arrange for him to come see you or you go see him. Spend the day or weekend together. See how you get on in person. This is more important that speaking on the phone.

If you enjoy each others company and have fun, things will naturally progress. You will find out more about him and maybe the reason he doesnt call so much. If things dont go well its time to move on.
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Unread August 25th, 2009, 03:20 PM   #5
Pailix
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Default Re: why doesn't he call more often?

Quote:
Originally Posted by meegerprentice View Post
Yeah i've visited him, usually when we are in each others cities we make a point to call each other, just to hang out or something. We met through mutual friends.

He was contacting me on a daily basis and when I visited him last week he was extremely complimentive, wanted me to stay the night, etc. He cuddled with me and we made out.

But then he didn't call or contact me the next day, or the next, so I sent him a message that said, "hey I had fun the other night, we should hang out more often" and still no reply for a couple more days. It's kind of out of character for him because he usually responds pretty promptly. When he did reply it was short, he said he was busy at work and that he had fun too.

Then I responded to that message about 2 days ago and he hasn't responded back. He just read it.

You have to understand I'm a really lonely person right now because I'm not in a place where I want to be right now. I am extremely analytical and often times make something out of nothing.

How can I ask him what his intentions are without being seemingly clingy or trying to rush things, which I'm not trying to do. I'm just an overanalyzer not trying to get into a situation that may get me hurt.
Well then that makes more sense...

Along the lines of what you are saying... I think he moved on. Sure although you had fun, inside he might've not, or either tried to find another girl. Because suspiciously, him somehow being busy, and him not returning your calls, either means he really is busy, or has found someone else. He is probably also giving you the impression he isn't interested anymore if he doesn't call/text you back.

DON'T ANALYZE.. If it works out, it works out, trying to analyze or overdo it forces you to become paranoid, and you might freak out like by claiming possession of him mentally, and then being clingy. Just calmly take it as is now, and wait for him to contact you. If he doesn't respond for 2-3 weeks, then you know he isn't interested.
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