C0nfus3d_Ab0ut_L1f3
April 2nd, 2005, 11:51 PM
Where does it go in time...
...the feeling...
...the emotion...
...the passion...
......the care...
When does love no longer find its way to your heart the way it used to...
...the way it should have been...
...the way that its still missed...
Why does it fade...
...making you believe almost in the hope and premise that it never existed...
...it was all an illusion...
...an ill-fated mistake...
...one that you can't seem to get over...
Who was the one that gave up...
...the one that fell into the muddy pits of the relationship...the one that couldn't stand again...
...the one who gave in.
Or was it a little bit of both persons?
Time flows like a river, and history seems to repeat itself. The trivial fights...the making up...the promise that it'll never happen again...
...followed by the sorrow that eases its way back in when conflict strikes again.
The cycle wears you down after time. The hope that it will never happen again...
...then the sadness when it does. Each time believing that this is the last fight...
...the only fight...
...never again.
It breeds anguish, and fear. The consistency of fear draws out anger...
...why...
...Why should this be allowed.......did I not want a REAL relationship finally...and not another dead end? Was it too much to ask for someone that didn't belittle you, make you feel unimportant as they bragged about past lovers and their pros...
...always sure afterwards, to mention your cons.
The filth of the hate that draws you away...
...the attention you yearn for seeps out of your mind and heart like black blood, and it tells you...
...yes, it tells you to give up...
...to leave the person...
It makes you want to be everything your partner says you are...a liar...a cheater...and abuser...
...Why? To fit their standard of what they expect you to be. Hoping they can categorize you into the "every other asshole" boy friend or girlfriend they've had in their past life...
To become that person that hit them, that slept with them and left them, that used them for money or simply had them around to tell the world "Hey, I'm not alone!"
You want to be everything you aren't...the whore that sleeps around while they're at work...the slut that kisses you with tainted lips that worked the thick shaft, of your better hung friend...
...Fuck it.
To live or let go.
Fuck it all.
To live, and let live...
FUCK IT!!!
To believe you are everything that they say you are...just to hit that striking point...
...that boiling point...
Yes...
Faster, comes the screaming..
...every meaning, closing doors.
Faster...
Faster...comes the crying, from the lying, cheating whores...
Faster, faster...riding...
...clearly, never meaning, no "sincerly" sways the mind from death so nearly...
...riding riding, cheating whore...
Tale of tomorrow...seems no more.
And it tires, in it's anger...
...be it one, or be it stranger...
To the one, that never listens...
...to the words, spoke out of anger...
Need it be, this game of tricks...
...once so broad, it makes me sick...
...to see the branches, turn to sticks...
...that crumble feebily, to the floor...
...ever wondering, this behavior, still I'm begging for a savior...
And I find none, with this anger...that leads me to, the distant door...
...Dealing with this, not once more.
Say goodbye, eternal sadness...
..that dreams up, new ways of madness...
...tell me nothing, as I'm leaving...
...Call me nothing...but a "whore"...
With my smile, that is growing...
...with my heart, thats still there, showing...
...something new, but always knowing...
Close the door...
Your "bitch" is gone.
...the feeling...
...the emotion...
...the passion...
......the care...
When does love no longer find its way to your heart the way it used to...
...the way it should have been...
...the way that its still missed...
Why does it fade...
...making you believe almost in the hope and premise that it never existed...
...it was all an illusion...
...an ill-fated mistake...
...one that you can't seem to get over...
Who was the one that gave up...
...the one that fell into the muddy pits of the relationship...the one that couldn't stand again...
...the one who gave in.
Or was it a little bit of both persons?
Time flows like a river, and history seems to repeat itself. The trivial fights...the making up...the promise that it'll never happen again...
...followed by the sorrow that eases its way back in when conflict strikes again.
The cycle wears you down after time. The hope that it will never happen again...
...then the sadness when it does. Each time believing that this is the last fight...
...the only fight...
...never again.
It breeds anguish, and fear. The consistency of fear draws out anger...
...why...
...Why should this be allowed.......did I not want a REAL relationship finally...and not another dead end? Was it too much to ask for someone that didn't belittle you, make you feel unimportant as they bragged about past lovers and their pros...
...always sure afterwards, to mention your cons.
The filth of the hate that draws you away...
...the attention you yearn for seeps out of your mind and heart like black blood, and it tells you...
...yes, it tells you to give up...
...to leave the person...
It makes you want to be everything your partner says you are...a liar...a cheater...and abuser...
...Why? To fit their standard of what they expect you to be. Hoping they can categorize you into the "every other asshole" boy friend or girlfriend they've had in their past life...
To become that person that hit them, that slept with them and left them, that used them for money or simply had them around to tell the world "Hey, I'm not alone!"
You want to be everything you aren't...the whore that sleeps around while they're at work...the slut that kisses you with tainted lips that worked the thick shaft, of your better hung friend...
...Fuck it.
To live or let go.
Fuck it all.
To live, and let live...
FUCK IT!!!
To believe you are everything that they say you are...just to hit that striking point...
...that boiling point...
Yes...
Faster, comes the screaming..
...every meaning, closing doors.
Faster...
Faster...comes the crying, from the lying, cheating whores...
Faster, faster...riding...
...clearly, never meaning, no "sincerly" sways the mind from death so nearly...
...riding riding, cheating whore...
Tale of tomorrow...seems no more.
And it tires, in it's anger...
...be it one, or be it stranger...
To the one, that never listens...
...to the words, spoke out of anger...
Need it be, this game of tricks...
...once so broad, it makes me sick...
...to see the branches, turn to sticks...
...that crumble feebily, to the floor...
...ever wondering, this behavior, still I'm begging for a savior...
And I find none, with this anger...that leads me to, the distant door...
...Dealing with this, not once more.
Say goodbye, eternal sadness...
..that dreams up, new ways of madness...
...tell me nothing, as I'm leaving...
...Call me nothing...but a "whore"...
With my smile, that is growing...
...with my heart, thats still there, showing...
...something new, but always knowing...
Close the door...
Your "bitch" is gone.