She Wont go on the Pill..

[Bravehearter]

a little background.

Im almost 20. My gf is 18. We've been together for a few months. She is my first sexual partner. (yes thats right i waited till i was about 20 for it to happen) But she has had a bf for a year previously and they were intimate, and there were another guy or two as well. So she has a lot more sexual experince then me.

We are very sexual active right now. And im not really scared for diseases or anything, its getting her pregnent that scares me. We use condoms for birthcontrol. And i made sure to get the ones with spermicide. (Im not too sure what kind of difference they make But oh well)

I Guess the problem is that I am paranoid about pregency, I do not want to get her pregnent AT ALL. So i suggested that she go on the pill and that i would pay for it if that was a problem. She said there was no way for 3 reasons.
1. Its not natural
2. Her Breats will get bigger (and she doesnt want them to, she has nice ones already. About a C id say.
3. She doesnt want to gain an extra 20 lbs like her friends did.

Are these fears of hers legit or what..?
Is there anything I can do to convince her..?
Any other ways i can help prevent pregnency other then the pill..?

Any Help is greatly apriciated! Thanks.

[cutie-pie]

here are the pros and cons of the pill:

the cons:
1. it depends on the person to gain weight, if she gains weight easily, then she will, if she's been a skinny puppy all her life, she won't :) ALSO! I tell all my friends, would you rather gain weight or a baby! :o
2. it does make your boobies bigger, but all she has to do it buy bigger bras! no biggie :) I"m sure YOU"ll enjoy that :cool3:
3. the doctor will start with the lightest pill and if she notices any unnormal discharge, just go back to the doc and he'll put her on a stronger kind and it goes away within days!

the pros:
1. painless period
2. shorter and lighter periods
3. for those who like it, your boobies get bigger
4. clears up your skin of any pimples you may have
5. regulates your body
6. I only pay $3 a month for them :)
7. there's a 99.9% chance you DON"T GET PREGNANT!



send these to her!

[hunny]

Keep using condoms. I don't know if there is any way for you to convince her to go on the pill if she's dead set against it. I am on the pill and it's great, I only gained a few pounds, not even 5, so it's not likely that she would gain 20. Girls who say they gain 20 lbs from the pill.... I guess I can't say that's total bullshit but that sounds excessive to me.
I guess if she doesn't want the pill then she would object to the depo-provera shot for the same reasons.
Personally, since you asked, I think she is being a little worried over some pretty trivial things. Yeah she may gain a couple pounds and her breasts might get slightly bigger. But the benefits of the pill far outweigh any minor annoyances. Birthcontrol pills are very effective. Plus they regulate your periods, make your periods shorter, lessen cramps, and make your skin look great.
If she wont go on the pill then the only thing you can do is to ALWAYS use good condoms, with spermicide. That should be pretty effective. You need condoms anyway since she's had sex with other partners, for your own protection.

[cutie-pie]

I guess if she doesn't want the pill then she would object to the depo-provera shot for the same reasons.



my friend gained 60 lbs with the shot... no joke! then she switched to the pill and only gained 5 lbs!

[kerrielouise]

So i suggested that she go on the pill and that i would pay for it if that was a problem.
i never knew that you had to pay for the pill, is that only in america that u have to pay for it, or certain types of the pill u have to pay for?

Its not natural
neither are condoms but its better to be safe than sorry!


kerrie
--x--

[goofball]

2 things:

first, asking her to go on the pill brings about a sort of unspoken level of commitment, just be aware of this.

second, she obviously isn't that commited to not getting pregnant otherwise she would go on the pill. she is the type that will show up one day having 'accidentally' gotten pregnant and ask you to foot the bill.
I say dump her before it's too late.

[nicruns]

i agree w/ all the pros and cons that cutie pi said but on the same note as hunny you cant force her to do it. just be suportive and provide her w/ good info ie from planned parenthood and dont pressure her too much. maybe she will understand if you explain that sex is better when you know you are both protected and can relax.

[kuju]

again, you can't force her.

1. No, it's not natural, but hell, what IS nowadays?

2. Breasts really won't increase in size noticably. if they do, get the doctor to change pills.

3. If her friend gained 20 pounds, it wasn't because of the pill. Contrary to popular belief the pill does NOT make you gain weight! it makes you retain water a little more. just drink water and go to the bathroom whenever you have to. If you weight goes up more than two or three pounds, then switch pills.


In general, the pill has been absolutely incredible for me. I started on one, but switched to Alesse after two months because I had a slight ache in my breasts. I stayed on Alesse for about a year and a half until I decided to get on Depo-Provera. But I wouldn't suggest the shot for someone just starting out on birth control.

Can you direct your girlfriend to this site so she can hask her questions herself? Or perhaps you don't want her to know where you get your info from...

if you have any further questions, my e-mail is kuliajewel@yahoo.com

[Tootsie Pop]

I was somewhat on the same page. I didnt think that I would remember to take it, and that it would be a hassle.. plus I was a little scared of the gyno checkup.. bla bla bla... BUT Im tellin you: Once that condom breaks a week before you expect your period... She will change her mind REAL fast. When it happened to me, and I had to take morning after pills... I went the the doctor a few weeks later and went on the pill. Its really really worth it. I didnt have any weight problems or noticable side effects. Like they all said, you cant make her do it... just be as careful as you can. Condoms DO break, no matter how much she would like to think that they dont....

...sorry.. just a personal experiance.....

[surfy_dude]

Well, the thing about her boobs getting bigger and weight gain, is not something which will definitely happen to her. It's a potential side effect however. But, just depends on the person. And if u ask me, even though i am a guy, i'd much rather have my girlfriend take the pill. It is important that two contraceptives are always used. No single contraceptive device on its own is 100 pecent reliable.
Just get her to ask herself this question. Would she rather an unwanted pregnancy? or to prevent this, take the pill?
I mean, its a pretty difficult situation your in and you shoudnt try to 'convince' her what to do. Just talk to her about it.

[JohnSmith]

here are the pros and cons of the pill:

the cons:
would you rather gain weight or a baby! :o



hey, you could always say, if you don't go on the pill, you'll gain more weight! (get it, as in she gets pregnant! ha im so funny...)

[Deidre]

My own personal pet peeve with hormonal contraceptives is the same I have with all kinds of pills.. they're a fairly new way of altering the body and we don't know enough about these ways... and to add to that I dislike interfering with my body too much. It's the reason I don't pain killers or anything of the like. I would consider the pill, though, due to:
1) Low chance of pregnancy
... well, yes, that's it. That's the one reason I'm willing to sacrifice my ideals and standards and it's a damned good reason.
If she doesn't want to go on the pill, discuss it with her. Gather information with her. Both pros and cons. And look at real sources by actual physicians... not teen magazines and such. People who have little understanding for their body tend to write in to those and assume that just because they started taking the pill, that is the cause of everything that happens to them afterwards.

[cutie-pie]

hey, you could always say, if you don't go on the pill, you'll gain more weight! (get it, as in she gets pregnant! ha im so funny...)


heheh I get it :D

[SoSweetAngel]

The pill can make you gain weight because it increases your appetite (it simulates early pregnancy). I did gain about half a stone - but then I realised that I was eating too much and learned ton cut back a bit - and I'm fine now.

The other two things...well, I can't really argue with that.

Condoms are quite effective - and there are plenty of options if there is a problem (the morning after pill, coils, abortion...)
If she doesn't want to go on it - then you shouldn't try to make her.

kerrielouise: Yeah - you have to pay for that sort of thing in america - here's to being British! Yeha!

[oyevey]

actually u dont' have ot pay for it most states in america have made it legal for teen clinic to give out the pill and its free!! so check in to that at ur local clinic.

I def wanna go on the pill i just have to get to a clinic :roll: which is harder for me then most people my age on the account that my rents suc and won't let me get my lisence !! grrr but thats anothe topic ;)

[Madeku]

1. Its not natural
2. Her Breats will get bigger (and she doesnt want them to, she has nice ones already. About a C id say.
3. She doesnt want to gain an extra 20 lbs like her friends did.


good that you're using spermacide condoms..

1. what Is she some kind of naturally obsessed, callorie counting, health freak? Condoms aren't natural either. Hormones are more natural than Latex..
2. I doubt her breasts are gonna increase THAT much.. how tall is she, and how much does she weigh? cos large breasts can look just plain tacky on a petite girl.
3. that depends on how unstable her weight is, i believe.

[BigJim]

my g/f is on the pill, been on it for over a year now, and there's been no noticable increase in breast size AT ALL.

she hasn't notived a change, neither have I. in the first 2-3 months while the side-effects wear off, such as breast tenderness and other things, they MAY get slightly larger and more sensitive, but that goes away after a month or two.