Right Thing To Do Or Not?

[Matty J]

Ok well not much time to post this message but basically, hi im Matty J im 16/m/UK.

So me and this gal were getting on really well, id met her through a friend, the flirting was going great and i was gonna ask her out on wednesday, but she had athletics. Fair play, i couldnt ask her out. Anyways i thought thursday, again she had athletics. Now this meant that she was only online for about 10 minutes everynight and choosing the right moment was hard. She also seemed to be taking longer, and longer to reply to me on MSN. Anyways i bit the bullet rather than thinking "what if?" or having to wait another week, by which time things could have died completely and i asked her out.

She just said she had athletics, sorry. No, "Sorry but next saturday?" just "Sorry" She didnt even say she would go out with me. Then she went offline after saying shed "chat to me about it tommorow" :(

Im no fool, shes gonna say no right? No politeness please.

[Rammstein39]

Id say she probably just wanted to delay you asking again. Sometimes girls will be like "Lets talk about it later" so that they can get out of the situation at that time. I think you got the idea and should take the hint and move on. DOnt expect ehr to call and talk about it.

[Matty J]

Cheers. Its difficult to hold your head high when you feel like such a fool, for being led on.

[Deidre]

I'm not going to fool you, lad, it doesn't look good.

Rammstein39 is right, although the invitation to discuss it later could be positive, if she was really in a hurry and didn't have time to discuss another date. I know I would only say that if I was interested, but I subscribe to the "no bullshit" agenda, and not all people do.

I'd give it a rest. If she doesn't show much eagerness and interest, I wouldn't discuss it again and just show her less and less attention. If she seems interested, though, you can always ask her out again at a later date to be sure (but make it an 'open date' date, so to speak, so that she can't pull this again: "would you like to _____ with me sometime?", and if she says sure, ask her when she is free).

If she doesn't show much interest, though... consider this a blow-off for sure.

[Matty J]

Cheers guys. Thats what I was thinking. I spoke to her quickly on friday night but she was being a bit cold with me, she said that she felt bad about "what happened last night" (So that could be taken in any way. Feel bad cos you like me and said no, or feel bad because its an awkward scenario you dont wanna be in) And then she suggested we could go out sometime with her "friend and her boyfriend". Oh hello! Watching two other people who are in a long-term relationship and have been together a while tongue-ing, but guaranteeing that I wont do anything because frankly double dates are not the place to do "new" stuff. You want some privacy!

Im sure ive been given the brush off. Im not gonna even bring the subject up again with her.

But, why do it? She kept on pointing at all the signs telling me I was "cute" and "so much more honest than other guys" and being really flirty, then all of a sudden, its cold. Im not really that angry, I just cant see what the reasoning was for her to do it.

[Fun Lovin' Criminal]

You were a prop for her ego? Maybe she's unsure whether you like her (doubt it, but stranger things have happened)? Maybe she's afraid of men? Who knows, who cares. If I were you, I'd go along just for the ride, but not take it too seriously, a little indifference always goes a long way. If you come to the conclusion she's just stuffing you around: walk.