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Truth
February 1st, 2002, 06:09 PM
Hmmm, this one was missing too...


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Pictures (Part 1)

I hear the rain drops strike my window pane
as i listen to those droplets
tis' the sound of a very sad rain

as i hear the rain, i lay in my bed alone and cold
holding the pictures of the ones I have left
the ones that are now several years old

i look at the them and see
i see the things that were
the things that could be

pictures of a lifetime
pictures of a thousand words
now faded and gone without you here

I cherish these images
I will forever
but now there is no you
there is no matter

gone are the images of a love that we once knew
gone is our past
a past so dear, a past so true

faded and gone is the closeness of you and I
only a background remains of maybe a mountain, a bush, or a great sky

i lay in bed, wishing you could come near
to listen to the raindrops
and see the pictures that were once so clear

pictures of a lifetime
pictures of a thousand words
now faded and gone without you here

but now the images are just a mere fade
just a sillouette of you
and a background that will forever stay

in these pictures, i now stand alone with my arm around a faded outline
true love is now a faded dream, now a faded time

now gone is the life that i had once known
forever lost with no future of tomorrow

the scenery has faded
the image of you is gone
i am left alone
left with a face, sad and long

pictures of a thousand words
pictures of a liftime
these are pictures forever faded in these hands of mine

heartbrokenbaby
February 9th, 2002, 11:45 PM
1st tyme read dis 1 but it be very good great job :D

daydreamer
February 10th, 2002, 11:07 PM
Wow, I'm just at a loss for words... that was absolutely beautiful. Please, keep writing.

Laya
February 22nd, 2002, 07:28 PM
I liked it, very drawing and attracting.

Truth
February 23rd, 2002, 02:17 PM
I liked it, very drawing and attracting.



Thanks, I am glad you liked it so...Makes me happy.... :)

FireFly
March 4th, 2002, 03:57 AM
It's really a sweet / sad poem, but like, don't use the word pictures so much :P otherwise it just gets repedative and even though that can emphasise the importance of the object it really kinda doesnt...

But I do like ya poem, it's really pretty :)

Truth
March 4th, 2002, 04:27 AM
It's really a sweet / sad poem, but like, don't use the word pictures so much :P otherwise it just gets repedative and even though that can emphasise the importance of the object it really kinda doesnt...

But I do like ya poem, it's really pretty :)



thanks FireFly

criticisim noted....thanks...i will try to see what i can do to revise it somemore....

Truth
March 4th, 2002, 01:18 PM
It's really a sweet / sad poem, but like, don't use the word pictures so much :P otherwise it just gets repedative and even though that can emphasise the importance of the object it really kinda doesnt...

But I do like ya poem, it's really pretty :)



thanks FireFly

criticisim noted....thanks...i will try to see what i can do to revise it somemore....


So, I made some revisions to this poem...I hope it reads a bit better and is not as redundant....

Truth
March 8th, 2002, 02:11 PM
Any more opinions on this one..I had recently made some changes and was curious to what you all think on this poem....Anyone...