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View Full Version : Demon


JHXMT
March 5th, 2003, 10:02 AM
Meh, just a short one I wrote in a lecture (look, he told us NOT to take notes, what else was I supposed to do, pay attention? :roll: :lol: ) Not entirely pleased with it, but I don't really know why. Suggestions welcome.

Demon

The gleaming maw with a beam running through it.
Light glints, a silver demon in metallic skin.
Dull monotony separating the thin black line
From the sharp purity of the painful fires.
Movements, rotations, several rapid changes -
Position adjusts, the light alters its shades,
The skin shines like a dulled coal-diamond.
Leaving behind it a trail of pitch,
The beam of the demon scrawls across the sky.
People stare, run screaming, feel agony
As the darkness cuts into their land,
Bites, feeds, tears the living flesh
And leaves behind it an empty rotting hole,
A silent testament to the birth of a demon
In the shifting lights of a forgotten world.

rabidcowfromhell
March 7th, 2003, 02:07 AM
I'm scared now....

no no, that was wicked aweomse

Truth
March 7th, 2003, 02:08 AM
*shivers* i'm scared..... I liked the description, I could almost feel a demon right behind me....

vampbarbie
March 7th, 2003, 10:22 AM
Thats really cool. You really go a sense of demon-ness (I think I just made up a word there but hey)