PDA

View Full Version : Whole heap of confusion...


gsxr08
October 21st, 2010, 01:20 AM
So my story starts out innocently enough, I fell for a girl that see on an everyday basis. This came as a shock to me, seeing as how when we first met she was already in a relationship. We became really close friends, and one night when we were out with a bunch of friends drinking, I told her that I had feelings for her. Much to my surprise, she had feelings for me too.

We kept this under wraps for a while, I realized that she wasn't available, but we were drawn to each other and eventually we ended up spending time together without anyone knowing. This lead to the eventual demise of her relationship, and she became single. We continued to hang out constantly, and eventually ended up hooking up. Our feelings for each other became quite intense, and we had an ambiguous relationship for a little while, where we weren't dating but we were extremely close. This also came to a crashing end, she told me that she didn't feel that she was ready for a relationship and that she cared too much about me to possibly lead me on or hurt me in the end.

She still maintains communication with her ex, who can be a nice guy but just doesn't seem like the right person for her. I've seen the way that she acts when she's around him, her personality is stifled and she seems to be dying little by little on the inside. When we spend time together, she's vivacious, extremely outgoing, and I know that she notices the difference in the way she acts. I wish she'd just cut her ex out of her life, but she has a personality where she sets her own feelings aside to tend to other peoples instead (much like my own personality). This is obviously my own biased opinion...

In the end, all I want is to see her happy, and I'd like to possibly be part of that. I could really care less how she becomes happy, be it if she stays single forever, gets back with her ex, or eventually ends up dating me.

The last relationship I had ended back in March, so I've been "single" since then. I hadn't intended on having any sort of relationship for a while at least, but this girl came into my life and totally caught me off guard. I've told her I would wait for her if she wanted to date, but she just recently told me she didn't want to force me to wait for her. I'm crazy for her, not a day goes by that I don't think about her. I know that she feels the same way about me, but she's incredibly confused with everything that is going on in her life.

My question is this: I want to wait for her, but how long should I wait? Is it worth waiting? Should I just forget about her and move on with my life?

automorphism
October 21st, 2010, 03:35 PM
Whatever you do, you shouldn't spend a lot of time with her unless she commits to a relationship. And what's with the "I want her to be happy but I don't care how" bullshit. You clearly like her and you want to be with her, so actually you DO care how. Acknowledge it and take the appropriate actions.

Stardust 1
October 23rd, 2010, 08:43 AM
I would probably go out and if sparks fly with another girl then I would go that direction. I'm the type of person that thinks stuff said like that are hints. Lol.

gsxr08
October 23rd, 2010, 04:03 PM
Delete this plz???

foh4k
October 23rd, 2010, 05:31 PM
Delete what your post?
Why?

Is it BS?

gsxr08
October 23rd, 2010, 06:07 PM
Yes I was drunk when I wrote it.

foh4k
October 23rd, 2010, 06:16 PM
Seems as though drinking is the main impetus for all of this.

Is it possible that drinking could be a problem?

gsxr08
October 23rd, 2010, 06:37 PM
Perhaps, but that's something im working on with my therapist

foh4k
October 24th, 2010, 02:03 AM
Well let me tell you if it is, nothing will go right anywhere until you deal with that in itself.

Spoken from experience~~