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Truth
March 1st, 2002, 01:06 PM
::: Moments in Thought..(End to Pain Run Rampant, Pain Runs Deep).....


If I could turn back the hands of time
I would go back to that moment
That moment I asked you to be mine

During that instant when I held you tight
You and I felt eachother's hearts beat
And the love I felt was something I could not fight

However, it is now only a moment in thought
A moment that I can not have back
Now it is love that can no longer be sought

I suffer from the trials and tribulations of my life
A hopeless end with no means, is my fate
My heart is scared by bittersweet love's knife

Why suffer in this pain, I ask myself...
This agony attacks my soul
My mind is weak to control what is felt

To never let go, would have been my wish
Selfish, yes I know
But now, I am left with what my arms so miss

Taken away, was a happiness I had to find
A long life search
Which brought me to a moment when I asked you to be mine

Was this search in vain, I ask constantly
I have nothing to show for it
Except for a saddened heart and the life-time of memeories

Where do I go know, I am plauged with no escape
Take hither to hear my forgivness
This is a cycle, that has always been part fate

Dealt to me was an unfair hand of life
I have worked so hard for all that I have
But, yet I still search for the one thing that can end my strife

No more, give up and do not shed tears
take this away, of which that plauges
Take away which I do not want, take away my constant fears

My pain has run rampant, my pain had run too deep
It has gone for far to long and I will let go
To have my chance for that moment of sleep

Well, the night is late and I should bring this to end
My thoughts are dry, I look for rest
But, I fear the sleep and what my tears will send

Truth
March 4th, 2002, 01:28 AM
I wanted this poem to be a conclusion to a previous one that I had written about year and a half ago...it's entitled Pain Run Rampant, Pain Runs Deep....

If you want to read it before reading this one I just posted click below

http://rf.thedesigneng.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=306

Thanks

Truth

Truth
March 5th, 2002, 12:14 PM
any criticizims would be welcome and of a great help

Truth
March 8th, 2002, 02:13 PM
any criticizims would be welcome and of a great help


ANYONE :(

pleaz, i would greatly appreciate any opinion on this one...FireFly, Hallow13, Daydreamer. please let me know if this is good or if it just plain sucks because I am not sure......

and also if anyone can help me with a new title that would be great too, I don't like the title of this poem to much wither...

Truth
March 11th, 2002, 06:34 PM
oh, common everybody...someone must have at least one opinion on this.... :(

like, hey truth, you know what your poem really sucked ass...but keep writing...stuff like that.... :(

ANYBODY

Kidder_16
March 14th, 2002, 11:17 PM
I'll REPLY!! :D

Well I think this is an amazing poem. I often think about what it would be like if I could freeze a moment forever, or at least, take that feeling and be able to feel the same way again when I want. I wish somehow we could find a way to do that... Good job and definitely keep writing. *hugs*

FireFly
March 15th, 2002, 12:18 AM
The three line pattern / rhymes thing just doesn't do it for me, sorry.

Totally throws off the rythem to me, but otherwise it's a good poem :)

Truth
March 25th, 2002, 02:21 PM
thanks guys....whoo...i thought no one would ever reply....

and FF, i intentinolly wrote it to not have a rythm....

Soulfull_ Angel
March 25th, 2002, 10:28 PM
That was trully an amazing poem. I could feel your sence of helplessness to prevent what was happening and it touched me. I can relate to that poem which makes it a greater expirence reading it because it had the power to bring forth memories. I'm sure a lot of people know that feeling of helplessness. Well done!

Truth
April 2nd, 2002, 01:34 PM
That was trully an amazing poem. I could feel your sence of helplessness to prevent what was happening and it touched me. I can relate to that poem which makes it a greater expirence reading it because it had the power to bring forth memories. I'm sure a lot of people know that feeling of helplessness. Well done!

Thank you so much....what you had experienced reading is what I wanted the reader to get from it....

Thank you...