Unmasking my secret admirer

[Barefoot Matt]

I think most people who use Facebook have by now heard of an app called Honesty Box. For the uninitiated, it's an app that allows you to post a question on your profile which any of your friends can answer anonymously. The default question is "What do you really think of me," which generally generates some mildly interesting but not unexpected responses.

Recently, HB presented me with some recommended questions, and I was intrigued by one: "If I wanted to take you out for a romantic dinner, would you accept?" So I posted it.

I got one response, as follows, from an anonymous female: "YES!"

When I posted the question, I was just mildly curious to see what might come of it. Now, I'm intensely curious. Who is this person who is so enthusiastic about the prospect of a romantic dinner with me? Is it someone who I, too, would enjoy sharing a date with? For that matter, I have friends all over the continent (and a few off of it); do we even live in the same city?

So, my friends, I have a conundrum. How on earth do I figure out who this person is, without (a) asking out every female friend in whom I have a passing interest, or (b) embarrassing us both by convincing her to reveal her identity and then discovering that I'm not actually interested? Clearly, I need a strategy. This, I'm hoping, is where you come in. Help?

[Syph]

So, my friends, I have a conundrum. How on earth do I figure out who this person is, without (a) asking out every female friend in whom I have a passing interest, or (b) embarrassing us both by convincing her to reveal her identity and then discovering that I'm not actually interested? Clearly, I need a strategy. This, I'm hoping, is where you come in. Help?

Matt,

I'm no fan of anonymous apps, plenty of exploitation and lies can pass through. Maybe it was a female friend who isn't interested but wanted to make you happy. If you have been single for a long while, then she may want to give you the confidence boost to start searching again.

I'm a sceptic so I'm not going to be as optimistic about this as an advisor should.

This is a stab in the dark. Perhaps you should let this be a wonderful thing that was never said. And anyway she'll find you if she wants you badly.

Best of luck,

[ohsuzy]

yeah I agree. If that happened to me, of course I'd be curious, but I wouldn't really pursue anything

[phasesofthemoon]

I'm sure that there are far more opportunities for a young man to meet without all the game playing. Why not just get out from behind your computer screen and start searching for someone who would actually tell you "YES! I'd love to go out with you" and give you her name and number?

[Barefoot Matt]

I'm sure that there are far more opportunities for a young man to meet without all the game playing. Why not just get out from behind your computer screen and start searching for someone who would actually tell you "YES! I'd love to go out with you" and give you her name and number?

Oh dear, that makes me sound desperate. I assure you, I'm not, and I have plenty of non-Facebook contact with real people. I'm just curious. :)

Thanks for the advice, folks - I suppose my curiosity will have to go unsated.

[Kuky]

Well, what options do you have? Do you, for example, have the ability to "like" that response or comment on it, in such a way that the author will get notified? You can probably put something quick and clever in there.

[Barefoot Matt]

Yes, I can reply to the comment. The question is what "quick and clever" thing I should put there.

[Kuky]

I wonder if there is a published "such and such posted an answer to an honesty box question" published in friends' walls so you can narrow it down.

[phasesofthemoon]

Yes, I can reply to the comment. The question is what "quick and clever" thing I should put there. How about something like: "well, I guess since I don't know how to reach my anonamous "yes" girl, our dinner date will go unrequieted *sighs*"

[Kuky]

"I don't know just how fun or adventurous you are, but I'll be at <some coffee shop or whatever> on <day + time> for an hour or two, enjoying a book." :)

[Fusion Cuisine]

"I don't know just how fun or adventurous you are, but I'll be at <some coffee shop or whatever> on <day + time> for an hour or two, enjoying a book." :)

...without... embarrassing us both by convincing her to reveal her identity and then discovering that I'm not actually interested?

Gosh I can just imagine his poor secret admirer driving nine hours to sit in a coffee shop while he thinks "Ahh so it was her. Erm... wonder if she'll believe I just remembered I got a doctor's appointment"... :biggrin2:

Hmm I dunno this particular app. Doesn't it give any incentives to help you figure out the answer? It seems rather pointless and annoying otherwise :lol: I seem to remember a similar one that eventually revealed the person's identity if you amassed enough points somehow (I can't remember exactly).

Maybe that's an idea - use another similar app that does give you the chance to eventually find out identities. If she's that interested, she might see you're using it and give it a try herself.

[Kuky]

Unless you find a security vulnerability, you'll pretty much have to have her reveal her identity. That is, unless you want to get her to write a lot and analyze what the hell she's saying.

[Barefoot Matt]

You'll pretty much have to have her reveal her identity. That is, unless you want to get her to write a lot and analyze what the hell she's saying.

That is precisely what I want to do, in fact... the problem is that she's not writing back. Oh well! Her loss. ;)

[Kuky]

I guess she's not fun and adventurous after all. Or she's a dude. Might be me. *wink wink* bigboy hahaha