Should I ask him out?? 5 1/2 year age difference

[wonder83]

There is a guy who is one one my college classes. I talk to him a little every time we have class togehter and the other day we rode the same bus, and talked during the whole ride.

I think he likes me, so should I just be friendly and wait for him to ask me out? Or should I suggest we get together some weekend and do something?

Only thing is, he is 5 1/2 years older than me....does that matter? If I asked him out, might he get freaked cause I'm younger than he is? Like I said, it does seem like he likes me, but it can be hard to tell....any suggestions would be great! Thanks!

[zoe]

How old are you?

I don't reccomend it, but if you're comfortable with it, there's nothing wrong with giving it a chance. If you're not legal yet, though, I wouldn't reccomend it. Being a 17-21 year-old in college is a time to experiance things on your own, not with someone who's already experianced that period in their life.

... 5 years...

[Asphodelle13]

Five yrs is nothing(unless you're a minor), what matters is how mature he is, and you are...I think that guys tend to mature later(just an opinion from personal experience)..Don't judge someone by their age, that's a sad misconception...Ask him out on a casual date, what do you have to lose? At least you'll have a new friend.

[dulcinea]

Yeah... I mean, I dated a 23-year-old when I was seventeen. It wasn't a huge deal. But then again, he was the type of guy that never really dated near his age. Like, when he was in high school, he was dating women that were ten years older than him and such.

But I guess it does depend on how old and how mature you are, whether you and he can handle the age difference.

Sorry to inform you guys, but I observe that most girls are more mature than guys their age (when in highschool), but no where near mature as "adult men."

I look back and see nothing but immature girls. Very often it is that guys like dating girls that young to fufil a little fantasy guys have about dating 16 year olds (or whatever age they COULDN'T get when they were that age). Not to mention girls that young are naive as hell. A girl that age that is mature enough to date an adult and be in an adult relationship is just as rare as a guy who's mature enough for a girl his age in highschool.

More that likely, a girl that age is often dating an older guy who she THINKS is "so much more mature..." but honestly, seeing my friends dating younger girls... they're quite immature for my age. Highschool mentality, sometimes...


But I guess the key question is, are YOU in highschool still? Or an adult? 5 years is nothing once you leave the highschool shell from reality.

[Deidre]

People... she did say that he is in one of her college classes; which means that if she's probably over 18 (unless in Britain, in which it could be college in the sense of what comes after secondary school, but also the University).

Let's say just for the heck of it that she is 18 and he is 23. Depending on their respective maturities, it's not that big a difference. Most 23 year olds today aren't established, and thus still have a lot in common with people 5 years younger than them. I have friends (note: friends, not people I date, but whom I hang out with from time to time) who are up to 9 years older than (and down to 3 years younger). Assuming they have not "moved on" to some higher level of maturity (settled down, got a full-time job, got kids...) age is pretty much unimportant. If they have "moved on", however, it complicates things.

People... she did say that he is in one of her college classes; which means that if she's probably over 18 (unless in Britain, in which it could be college in the sense of what comes after secondary school, but also the University).

When I was in HS, I took college courses on the side. I wasn't 18. I was 16.

Btw, older people automatically are seperate from minor life in that they have actual responsibilities (taxes, carreers, etc) that minors would never fully understand or be able to help with.

[Deidre]

Btw, older people automatically are seperate from minor life in that they have actual responsibilities (taxes, carreers, etc) that minors would never fully understand or be able to help with.
I don't know about where you're from but I'm a minor and I pay taxes... just because you're not a minor doesn't mean you have a career "etc". That's my point. People from other walks of life; other points in their lives... that can be tricky. Around here lots of people, up 'til around the age of 25, still live at home. A little more up north its more common to move out and get married at 20, but using my experience, from where I am... there is not that much difference, with people who are still in school... now, I happen to have a bit too many friends who are that much older than me and are not in school and there's a bigger rift there, yes... but this guy is in school. He takes classes with her.

...you're able to take college classes at 16? Most places in the EU that's not an option at that age. I have a classmate who is from the Philipines and graduated from High School over there... only to come here and redo it all, because he was too young to get into a University here, and he wants to study in Europe.

[wonder83]

Thanks for the help so far, just so you all know, I am 20 and have been in college for 3 years. I'll be 21 in a few months. (USA college that is) :)

[Am I tight or not?]

you're old enough to be mature and responsible and make your own decisions.

it's not like we're talking about a 20 y/o dating a 15 y/o, you're not a kid anymore and if you're interested in the guy, who cares if he's older than you.

21? What's the big deal then.

[JaMiTHy]

ur 21! date him if u want!

[Stratocaster]

Well its really up to you and him. I sort of understand your plight though. I ALWAYS have crushes on 'older guys'. I usually only fancy guys that are in their 30s or above. Right now I've got a crush on a 54 year old!

[super_chevy2000]

It's not that big of a deal. I have a 18 year old friend who is seeing a 25 year old guy and their relationship is going good.

[moonangel]

20 and 25? That's nothing. Actually it's strange you say that. I'm 20 (tomorrow) and in the last few weeks I have met three 25 year-olds. With each one, I nearly fell out of my tree when they told me they were 25 - I mean they just seemed so much younger. I never would've been able to tell. 25, the age, to me, just seems so old. I mean one of these girls, who's 25, I thought she was younger than me. Age is nothing these days, it's just a number. It's all about maturity, and experience.

[PurpleObsidian]

Waah! I'm 25 in a few months...I guess I must be old :lol: Really though, age differences become less of an issue as you get older. A 20 y/o dating a 15 y/o could be a problem since legal issues tend to crop up :wink: If you are both in the same decade (20's etc) though, there shouldn't be a problem.

[Mooch]

Once you get past 20, it's hard to tell how old you are. :P

I'm only 20, and upper year students often think I'm older.

And most of my uni friends are older than me, but I wouldn't be able to tell if I didn't know.

[indigold]

the age thing doesn't really matter especially since you're now in your twenties, so you should go for it... ask him out first & he'll appreciate your gutsiness.

[Slimeboy]

I would say that is to much of an age differance.

[waiting_on_an_angel]

I say go for it. Go ahead and ask him out. You are both mature adults, well hopefully!

[1Diamond Tiara]

Very often it is that guys like dating girls that young to fufil a little fantasy guys have about dating 16 year olds (or whatever age they COULDN'T get when they were that age). Not to mention girls that young are naive as hell. A girl that age that is mature enough to date an adult and be in an adult relationship is just as rare as a guy who's mature enough for a girl his age in highschool.

More that likely, a girl that age is often dating an older guy who she THINKS is "so much more mature..." but honestly, seeing my friends dating younger girls... they're quite immature for my age. Highschool mentality, sometimes....
I just wanted to say i agree with that 110%~!! guys that date young teenage girls are sooo immature but it makes them feel like a "man" to be dating someone younger. They're like "she's mature for her age!" ya right. They are just fulfilling a fantasy of the girl they couldn't get when they were younger they were probably lusting over 12 yr olds though when they were 16 so who knows. :P
arg some guys make me sick. thats all i wanted to say :P
but yeah ur an adult and its not a big deal do what u want.