The Truth: Pain and Losing Virginity

[LittleAngel]

Hiya.The other day me and some of my friends were talkin about losing your virginity.One of my friends said it was so bad that she put scratches all down the guys back with her nails and she felt like it hurt so much she was gonna scream.She also said it hurt to sit down for a coupla days and that you can't really walk properly (she said you walk like a penguin afterwards :lol: ) so i was just wonderin is this true?? cos im kinda worried now!! :-?

[PurpleObsidian]

Not in all cases...it depends on the girl. Your friend may have been nervous and tense at the time and this can cause the pelvic/vaginal muscles to contract.

[Bath of Glitter]

Is your friend known to exaggerate a lot, or does she just have a low pain tolerance? She might not have been excited enough. Every girl is different, so it may be painful at first, and for others it may not hurt at all. If you've been fingered before, chances are it won't be painful...at least not very much.

[Tootsie Pop]

For some girls it is painful.. but I never heard of anyone who walked like a penguin afterwards.. or who wasnt able to sit down. She probobly only thought about the pain and tensed up every muscle in her body. I never did that.. but I could imagine that it would cause some pain.

[kuju]

well, generally, its not going to feel GOOD the first time, but the amount of pain varies. usually it's an ache. You just have to concentrate on RELAXING. and I mean actually thinking the word, "relax" in your head. concentrate on relaxing the vaginal muscles. let him do the work.

AND MAKE SURE HE GOES SLOW!

as for afterwards, I had trouble walking for about an hour or two, I mean, I could walk, but it was like a cowboy.

[Raptor]

put scratchs down his back?

lol i can just imagine that - 'i'm gonna cum, baby i'm gonna cu...ARRGGHH!!!'

[Asphodelle13]

Naaaw its not that bad...what helps is a lot of foreplay to get into the mood, make sure that you have enough natural lubrication, otherwise it definetely would be painful.(kinda feels like sandpaper for the both of you)..maaan if I ever had sex without foreplay(kissing, oral sex, whatever) beforehand I probably wouldn't be able to walk, I think I'm pretty sensitive to pain and I get easily turned off by it. :roll:

[SoSweetAngel]

Normally I'd say tht everyone is different, but I think your friend is exaggerating - it can't possibly have hurt that much!!
My first time didn't really hurt at all.

My boyfriend would have stopped if I'd asked him too, but I think even the most uncaring bloke would stop if his girlfriend was tearing his skin off. eek! :-?

[Nurseman]

Yes, sex is the most amazingly painful awful evil experience you will ever have. THATS why there are 6 BILLION people on Earth. 8)

Actually, everybody is different. While many young people report that their first sexual experience left much to be desired (Yet ANOTHER reason not to save it for the wedding night, but lets not go there) many more think it was the cat's ass!

Sex is stimulating, feels VERY good and can create a sense of intimacy that you can't find in any other human act. Don't loose a moments sleep worrying about this.

But you CAN worry about the hell I'll give you if you don't use protection!

:evil:

[BigJim]

a great tip:

no matter how much of a cassanova you think you are, and how it might hurt your ego, use some extra lube the first time. get some KY or other lube.

it'll help the first time be a better experience.

[hunny]

Ahhhh, Nurseman, you're back...
Speaking from a girl's POV I can tell you that it hurt me a little but nowhere near the horrible agony, screaming back-clawing horror you are describing.
A lot can be said for a guy who takes his time and is super gentle with you. This in itself can make it a good experience, as opposed to something you just want to get done with.
So really don't worry about it. When you're ready it'll be ok, and you won't have to scratch anybody's back to pieces.
Unless, of course, you're both into that.... :wink:

[nicruns]

it didnt hurt at all...i didnt even bleed...but i'm not the norm. I was a gymnast and stradled a few balance beams in my days...ouch. anyways.... just take it slow and dont think about it hurting. I f you are REALLY worried and you KNOW that you are gonna have sex that nigt then i suggest drinking a little bit of alcohol....not piss ass drunk mind you, but enough to get you SLIGHTLY tipsy. this will help you stay relaxed.

[Tortuga]

Hey LittleAngel,

I've been having sex for about 8 months, and I confess I still feel like I walk bowlegged for a couple of days after making love. Whether I actually do or not I don't know, but it sure feels that way. I don't mind at all, though--it's not really pain, just more...uncomfortable, I guess. Like I worked my thigh muscles a little too hard at the gym. But it is Well Worth It! :)

Tortuga

PS--as far as screaming goes...maybe she was confusing pain for an orgasm 8) --ttga

[Tessa LeAnn #2]

My first time hurt, and I bled. I was so swollen and bruised down there that I couldn't cross my legs, or even lay with my legs together for about three days. BUT, I'm a worse case scenario because:
1-I'm petite
2-I never used tampons or inserted anything in there before my first penetration
3-I was nervous and tense
4-he was very experienced and lasted for two hours, and he wasn't exactly gentle either

The good news is that it only gets better. My second time (a week later, same guy) was not painful at all, just a bit uncomfortable. But by my fourth or fifth time I was loving every minute of it. Just don't sweat it, and make sure you really are into the guy, then, no matter what, you'll want to do it again soon even if it hurts a bit the first time...trust me, it's worth it.

Tessa
20/f